Not Your Type

i really liked this poem. It relates to the everyday girl, the ones that will read this peom. I also like the narrator's courage to come to terms with herself. Many people can't do that, and it's likable that she can; it's good work.

SafeHouse wrote:One glance from across the room
and immediately my heart fills in the blanks. Careful with the adverbs.
Through its carefully constructed facade I notice a sparkle in your eyes, This is a very long line.
it's laced with longing and desire as you see my face. I would rework this.

My heart tells me many lies.
You want me.
You need me.
You love me.

But my head holds my brain
and a feeling there tells me different. Why don't you simply say, "But my brain tells me different."

I am not like the girls you go for,
I am not the girl with the right clothes and perfect hair Think of an alternative adjective for "right."
and I have not mastered that sly grin you seem to fall for,
I am completely different.
I am not your type. Not sure you need this line.

My heart's illusion is shattered by realization. I like this line.
Gone from your eyes is the sparkle, Could be worded better.
I suppose it was never really there.
For I am just a regular girl.
For I am just me.

This poem was really sweet. It was innocent and kind of sorrowful, but it also had a side of acceptance in who you are.

One glance from across the room
and immediately my heart fills in the blanks.
Through its carefully constructed facade I notice a sparkle in your eyes, Okay, I don't think this line really flows. it seems like it should be two seperate lines
it's laced with longing and desire as you see my face.

My heart tells me many lies. I like this line. Good logic and emotion at the same time. It shows that you are willing to follow your heart, but also that you know when your emotions are blinding you.
You want me.
You need me.
You love me.

But my head holds my brain
and a feeling there tells me different.

I am not like the girls you go for,
I am not the girl with the right clothes and perfect hair
and I have not mastered that sly grin you seem to fall for, Nice vocabulary.
I am completely different.
I am not you're type.Sorry but I always catch these things. It should be 'your' not 'you're'. You're would mean "I am not you are type."

My heart's illusion is shattered by realization.Good metaphor
Gone from you're eyes is the sparkle, I like what you did here. Most people would have said, "The sparkle from your eyes is gone" but I like how you mixed it up. It has a better flow and seems more sophisticated. (SORRY! but once again it should be 'your')
I suppose it was never really there.
For I am just a regular girl.
For I am just me.I like how you kind of accepted who you are here.