The Three Lockets [Chapter 2.2]

They spent the next hour wandering through the many aisles of the flea market, pointing out some of the more interesting wares on display. Cass took note of what they saw the most - there was a plethora of old dolls, jewelry and clothing. While Aspen was drawn to the tables selling miscellaneous items that the vendor was trying to get rid of, Cass' favorite tables were the ones displaying handcrafted goods. She had tried countless craft kits when she was a kid, but had never been able to end up with a creation that satisfied her. Knowing how much hard work and effort went into making some of the crafts on display made them all the more appealing. They each found one thing that they wanted: Aspen got her hands on an old Hardy Boys book and Cass found a little purple rope bracelet.

The two made sure to stay close together. Even if Cass grew bored by Aspen's newest discoveries, she would stay beside her - it was easier than dealing with people she didn't know, and there was always something that would catch her interest.

But even Aspen eventually grew tired of looking at the tables, and it was quickly decided that they would head back to the jeep. They'd cover the tables they didn't already see by heading through those aisles. If they saw something that interested them, they would stop at that table. If they had no interest in anything the vendor was selling, they would simply walk by it. Cass would have been happy if they had just gone back to the jeep, but Aspen was adamant about the plan. It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

Cass wasn't exactly sure what something like that would be, but she wasn't going to argue. This was what Aspen had chosen to do. If it meant making her best friend happy, she'd gladly spend the rest of the day wandering the aisles of the flea market. She was relieved when Aspen only chose to stop at a handful of tables, and even more relieved when she came to quick decisions on if she wanted to purchase her newest find or not. Cass was just happy to linger behind her; she wanted to be done as soon as they could be.

But as Aspen stopped to chat with a vendor about some of the vintage games he was selling, Cass caught a glimpse of something out of the corner of her eyes. It was only a flash - the sun reflecting just right on something golden in a case of jewelry - but Cass felt inexplicably drawn to it. She looked at the table they were currently at, then at the table with the jewelry. She yearned to see it, and the thought of someone buying it before she could terrified her. It was important, whatever it was.

"Aspen?" she hesitantly interrupted, seeing that her best friend was still very much engaged in the conversation with the vendor. "I'm going to that table over there. I need to see something."

Aspen continued to study the video game she currently had in her hand, having flipped it over to read the description on the back. "'Kay. Just give me like a minute to finish here and then we can check out that table-"

"I'm going to head over now," Cass said.

Aspen popped her head up. "You what? Cassie, did I hear that right? You want to go over there on your own?"

Cass nodded. Whatever that gold thing was, it was calling to her. She couldn't wait for Aspen to finish, especially when the feeling she had now was oddly reminiscent of what she had experienced back in the jeep.

Aspen looked between the vendor and Cass.

She carefully placed the video game back on the top of the stack she had grabbed it from, gave a quick goodbye to the vendor and hurried to join Cass as she started to head towards to the table. She could see Aspen giving her a worried look as they came to a stop in front of the table, but her best friend didn't voice whatever concerns she apparently had. She remained oddly silent, studying her in the way that she had back when they first met.

Cass turned her attention away from her best friend to the table itself.

The vendor was a young man. He was in his late twenties at most, but likely younger. He watched the two of them approach from a camping chair with a smile on his face. An array of different wares were spread out across his table, but Cass had eyes only for the jewelry case. She scanned it for what she had caught a glimpse of, certain that she would find it in a matter of seconds.

"Hello," the man said.

She momentarily paused her search.

"Hi," she shyly replied, giving an awkward little wave. She wasn't quite sure how to continue the conversation, not when Aspen was staying silent.

He gestured at the case. "It looks like you have your eye on something," he guessed, continuing to give her a smile.

She nodded. "I couldn't really see it from where I was standing, but I think it was gold?" It was hard to find the right words when she knew how important this was. A casual conversation was always a little difficult, but was never like a conversation where she was trying to reach a specific outcome.

He rose from the chair, walking over to the side of the table that the case of jewelry was on. He studied the case before pointing to the corner his golden jewelry was in. A flyer from another one of the tables had flown over and covered it, but he quickly removed it. "Hmm...I have a couple of golden things. A few bracelets, a ring or two, and a locket."

Cass looked where he was pointing.

The bracelets and rings looked as if they could have come from a professional jewelry store, but it was the locket that truly caught her eye. It was small and simple - just a little heart with black lines swirling around a small white gem in the center. Cass knew immediately that this locket was what she had seen, and was just as certain that she needed to buy it. She was already reaching for her wallet when she asked the man for the price. She eagerly handed him the amount he stated, then waited for him to get the locket out of the case. It just felt right to hold it in her hands.

She traced the lines with her fingers as Aspen and the man started chatting about the other things he had on display. She noticed Aspen reaching into her purse for her wallet, but was far too focused with the locket to notice. She carefully put the locket on. The warm metal heart rested against her chest as she went to join Aspen.

Aspen's newest purchase was also around her neck: a locket identical to her own, only made of silver instead of gold. Aspen gave her a large grin when she saw what Cass was looking at. "I thought we could have matching lockets, since we never got around to getting friendship necklaces." Though she was grinning from ear to ear, there was still a distracted look to her eyes.

It wasn't until they had thanked the man and arrived back at the jeep that Cass found out why.

Aspen waited until both of their doors had been shut. The key was in the ignition and her hands were on the wheel, but the car remained exactly where it was. Aspen looked over at her, the worry having spread from her eyes to even her smile. Her lips had turned down into what was almost a frown. Cass easily recognized the expression. It was a rare one, but she had seen it several times before.

Aspen was concerned.

"You've been acting weird," Aspen simply said.

Cass gave her a blank stare.

"I don't want to offend you," she continued, "and I'm really happy that you felt confident enough to go over to that table. But I don't know...It just wasn't like you, Cassie. You were terrified back when we first got here. It's like something came over you, and I just want to make sure everything's alright."

Cass absentmindedly ran her fingers across the locket. "I felt like I did when I heard the music, Aspen. I-I had to get this." The look Aspen had on her face made it clear that the explanation wasn't enough. "That's the only way I can say it..."

Aspen sighed and started up the car. "Okay."

"Okay?"

Her best friend nodded, looking behind them to make sure no cars were heading in their direction as she started to pull out. "I'm definitely unsatisfied, but it's not like I can expect you to explain something that you don't even get."

The jeep left the parking lot.

They drove down the road in an uncomfortable silence, Cass fingering her locket the entire time.

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Wed Dec 18, 2019 4:12 am

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Lib wrote a review...

Heyo!

This time I'm here for a review sooo here we go. Hope you're doing well by the way!

Aspen is so funny lol. Also, this is titled 'The Three Lockets'. Where's the third one? Is the man wearing it? Who has it??

The part where Cass says, 'I felt like I did when I heard the music,' sounds so eerie! But in a good way, ya now? It gave me goosebumps! x)

Last thing, this is a very teeny thing, but since you've got two female characters, and you have to keep on saying 'she', it sorta gets confusing who you're talking about so maybe make that a bit clear...? I'm not saying you gotta change their gender or anything, you just gotta make it clearer. =)

Promise this is the last thing--

It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

I am literally in love with this line! It's hilarious and beautifully put! Kinda remains me of me too. :p

Alright, that's it for now. I shall continue on to the third chapter. ;^)

And as always...

Keep on writing!

~Liberty

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Tue Sep 18, 2018 9:36 am

Panikos wrote a review...

Hiya, Sae! I'm going to blitz through as many chapters of this as I can today because (a) I just want to keep reading and (b) revmo calls.

Small Comments

It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

Amazing. 100% brilliant characterisation. I adore overdramatic characters so you've hit on my personal weakness.

This was what Aspen had chosen to do. If it meant making her best friend happy, she'd gladly spend the rest of the day wandering the aisles of the flea market.

This is...a bit too sappy and sweet for my liking. Try not to overdo the best friend devotion. It doesn't feel massively realistic, because in my experience really close friends are comfortable enough to be like 'oh my GOd can you hURRY UP PLEASE' rather than being all like 'anything for you! Anything to make you happy!' I guess it's skewed by the fact that Cass has a crush on her, but like, c'mon. Get a grip, Cass.

She could see Aspen giving her a worried look

What kind of worried look? Is she frowning? Has she bitten her lip?

She was already reaching for her wallet when she asked the man for the price. She eagerly handed him the amount he stated, then waited for him to get the locket out of the case. It just felt right to hold it in her hands.

I feel like you miss a trick here. How much was the locket? If it's gold, you'd expect it to be really expensive. You could easily go down the route of making it cost tons, using up all of Cass's money - that'd be a great way to show how desperate she is to have it. You could even have Aspen be like 'wait, what?' and try to stop her handing the cash over. That would tie very well into what she says at the end about Cass behaving oddly.

Or you could have the locket be much, much cheaper than a bit of golden jewellery should be, and that would raise another question: why? Might the vendor be keen to get rid of it...?

Overall Thoughts

This was another improvement. I like that you linked Cass's anxiety and her reluctance to leave Aspen's side to the moment where she first saw the locket - that's the kind of cohesion I was talking about in my last review, where something from a previous chapter develops and establishes something new in a following one. It's a great way to show how desperate she is to own that locket, but Zoom is right that having Aspen chip in with the whole 'did I hear that right? You want to go over there on your own?' felt a bit overboard, like it ruined the subtlety of the moment. It might be even more effective to have Cass not even say anything to Aspen. She could just walk straight over to the jewellery table without thinking about it, so that Aspen doesn't immediately notice she's gone. That would be even stranger behaviour, even more out of character.

I agree with the other reviewers that a lot of the first half of the chapter could be trimmed down, but I also want to talk about your style of telling. We tend to focus so much on showing that we forget that telling is a technique in itself, which needs to be perfected just as showing does. Let's talk about this bit as an example:

They spent the next hour wandering through the many aisles of the flea market, pointing out some of the more interesting wares on display. Cass took note of what they saw the most - there was a plethora of old dolls, jewelry and clothing. While Aspen was drawn to the tables selling miscellaneous items that the vendor was trying to get rid of, Cass' favorite tables were the ones displaying handcrafted goods. She had tried countless craft kits when she was a kid, but had never been able to end up with a creation that satisfied her. Knowing how much hard work and effort went into making some of the crafts on display made them all the more appealing.

The key to good telling is specificity and detail. Obviously, you have to be brief, but it is possible to be brief and precise at the same time. Rather than glossing over things from a distance as you do here, you need to select and hone in on a limited number of images. I often compare good telling to flicking through a picture album - the pictures are as sharp and clear as any other, but flicking through them means that you only glimpse a few.

The problem with this paragraph is that you're very general. You say there are dolls, jewellery, clothing. There are miscellaneous items, though you don't clarify what kind. You talk about handcrafted goods, which is incredibly broad - it could mean anything from quilts to necklaces to tapestries to homemade toys. The result is that it's difficult to put a picture together of the scene, because there aren't enough specifics to anchor us.

What I'd suggest would be to treat the paragraph as a highlights reel rather than a general overview. Maybe mention that Aspen got completely enamoured with a vintage furniture stall, and that she and Cass argued for five minutes about whether a hand-carved bedside table could fit in the back of the Jeep or not. Or talk about Aspen pointing to a boggle-eyed old doll with missing hair and saying 'that's you' to Cass. Keep it specific to give us a flavour of how the day was, but don't elaborate too much. It's about managing the balance between brevity and detail.

On that subject, I'll leave you with this fantastic article. The whole thing is about showing and telling, but there's a particular section that contrasts good telling with bad telling in a better way than I can explain here. It's a great read.

Other than that, I don't really have many critiques. It's interesting that the locket had so much more of a pull on Cass than Aspen; I suspect that's going to be relevant going forwards. I think you handled the conversation in the car at the end pretty well too - it wasn't overdone, and I loved the uneasy silence that the chapter closed with. I'm getting very keen for the main plot to start now, I must admit, but I suspect that will come in the next chapter. I'm guessing they're going to go off hiking and then something weird will happen with the lockets?

Keep writing!

~Pan

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Sun Jul 29, 2018 12:37 am

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BluesClues wrote a review...

It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

10/10 characterization, absolutely love it, still laughing.

I really like that Aspen immediately noticed how odd Cass was acting and followed her right over to the other vendor's table. To be honest, she's got such a strong personality that I almost expected her to either insist that Cass wait or to stay at her table until she was finished up, and I think it really shows their friendship ~~slash more than friendship~~ that Aspen noticed that this was odd behavior for Cass and abandoned her own interests immediately to make sure everything was all right.

I also really like the way this is set up, where - even before she saw what it was - the locket had an irresistible pull on Cass.

(Did the other locket have a similar pull on Aspen? Or did she only buy it because it matched the gold one? If the first, she might mention that at some point, if not in the Jeep right now.)

I also think their discussion about the locket felt a little smoother than the one about their dreams and the way Cass felt hearing the music. It might just be because you were able to compare it to the way she felt about the music, since we already got that conversation (plus an antique locket calling to someone is a little different than "I know this music" "yes I know, we heard it yesterday" "no that's not what I mean").

You could definitely trim the flee market scene overall, mostly the longer paragraphs at the start of this chapter. Specifically, I'm thinking of the way you describe them stopping at tables that interest them and passing tables that don't offer anything interesting at a quick glance. It could just be because I go antiquing a lot, but that's pretty obvious - it's just the way you do it when you're at a flee market, antique mall, community garage sale, any large event where there are going to be multiple vendors, really. Otherwise you're there for a zillion years, looking at things you don't even care about. So that part can definitely be trimmed down a bit - especially since we've got that "best day ever" chapter right at the start of the novel.

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Fri Jul 27, 2018 2:01 am

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Carlito wrote a review...

And hello once again!!

And we have the lockets

It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

Relatable Aspen. Relatable. :p

I liked how you showed the locket drawing Cass in and how she didn't even think, she just acted and bought the thing. But where did Aspen get her locket from? Only one locket was mentioned by Cass and then suddenly Aspen has one too.

I thought the ending of the chapter felt a little rushed. It made sense that Aspen wanted to buy a locket of her own for friendship necklaces. I'm curious if she felt the same draw or pull that Cass did. If she didn't, what drew her to the necklace? It sounded like Aspen bought hers right before Cass got hers because when Cass turns she sees Aspen wearing one too. Did Aspen see Cass wearing it and think oh that looks nice, I want one too? Or did they independently find these necklaces and they just so happened to be the same?

I didn't quite buy Aspen's shock about Cass going to a booth by herself. I get that Cass is anxious and wandering around by herself is well outside her comfort zone, but they've been at this market for several hours now. Usually after some time goes by anxiety-provoking situations don't feel as anxiety provoking anymore. It would be natural for Cass to feel more comfortable as time went on. Not that she's going to suddenly warm up and become a social butterfly like Aspen, but I don't think it'd be that weird for her to go to a booth by herself at the end of the shopping trip, especially since Aspen was still close in case Cass felt she needed her.

I don't think you need the conversation at the end about Aspen voicing concern about Cass going off on her own. I also don't think you need to make the connection to the song from earlier yet either. Slow reveal. I know we don't know a ton of info yet and there will be much more to reveal later, but still. Slow. Maybe later she can be processing why she felt so drawn to the necklace and make that connection to the dream stuff. Again, I'll weigh in more once we get a little farther into the plot and I have a better sense of how all of this will pan out and be paced

Looking forward to the next installment!! Let me know if you have any questions or if there's something you'd like feedback about that I didn't mention!

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Thu Jul 26, 2018 6:26 pm

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Zoom wrote a review...

Hey Saen!

Glad to see another chapter fragment so soon!

They spent the next hour wandering through ~~the many aisles of~~ the flea market~~, pointing out some of the more interesting wares on display. Cass took note of what they saw the most - there was a plethora of old dolls, jewelry and clothing.~~ While Aspen was drawn to the tables selling miscellaneous items that the vendor was trying to get rid of, Cass' favorite tables were the ones displaying handcrafted goods. She had tried countless craft kits when she was a kid, but had never been able to end up with a creation that satisfied her. Knowing how much hard work ~~and effort~~ went into making ~~some of~~ the crafts on display made them all the more appealing. They each found one thing that they wanted: Aspen got her hands on an old Hardy Boys book and Cass found a little purple rope bracelet.

I advise to delete some of this. You’ve already indicated in 2.1 that there are many various items on sale etc

When you described the tables Aspen was drawn to, you were very vague (the part I bolded). If you decide to keep this sentence, I advise to be more specific about the items that caught her eye, otherwise there’s no need to mention it at all. We can gather that she would be drawn to “miscellaneous items” because that pretty much covers everything at the flea market ^_^

“They each” sounds odd to me, I would have thought the word “both” would be more appropriate when referring to two people.

What I do love, though, is how you used their purchases to show characterisation and backstory. That is a great example of not forcing these details into the story but allowing them to blend in organically. Nice!

But even Aspen eventually grew tired of looking at the tables, and it was quickly decided that they would head back to the jeep. They'd cover the tables they didn't already see by heading through those aisles. If they saw something that interested them, they would stop at that table. If they had no interest in anything the vendor was selling, they would simply walk by it. Cass would have been happy if they had just gone back to the jeep, but Aspen was adamant about the plan. It would be, in her words, "an absolute nightmare and the worst mistake of her life" if they overlooked something extraordinary.

Cass wasn't exactly sure what something like that would be, but she wasn't going to argue. This was what Aspen had chosen to do. If it meant making her best friend happy, she'd gladly spend the rest of the day wandering the aisles of the flea market. She was relieved when Aspen only chose to stop at a handful of tables, and even more relieved when she came to quick decisions on if she wanted to purchase her newest find or not. Cass was just happy to linger behind her; she wanted to be done as soon as they could be.

This is really tedious, you’re going overboard describing how somebody shops at a flea market.

"Aspen?" she hesitantly interrupted, seeing that her best friend was still very much engaged in the conversation with the vendor. "I'm going to that table over there. I need to see something."

Aspen continued to study the video game she currently had in her hand, having flipped it over to read the description on the back. "'Kay. Just give me like a minute to finish here and then we can check out that table-"

"I'm going to head over now," Cass said.

Aspen popped her head up. "You what? Cassie, did I hear that right? You want to go over there on your own?"

Okay, you have really good instincts here. It’s clever how you’re using the fact that Cass wants to walk on her own as a way of emphasising just how compelled she is by the locket. I totally get that this is a huge break of character for Cass and therefore very significant. My problem is that I think this dialog completely kills this intense moment. I already completely understood that Cass is emotionally tethered to Aspen due to her social anxiety. Therefore if she had just walked away from Aspen without saying a word, this moment would have had so much more impact. If you decide to keep this dialog, then at the very least I suggest altering this last line from Aspen. It came across as very patronising. It’s kind of mean that she is drawing attention to Cass’s problem instead of supporting her, and I don’t think you intended that.

She could see Aspen giving her a worried look as they came to a stop in front of the table, but her best friend didn't voice whatever concerns she apparently had. She remained oddly silent, studying her in the way that she had back when they first met.
Cass turned her attention away from her best friend to the table itself.

Well yaknow how I feel about the “best friend” mentions ^_^

The vendor was a young man. He was in his late twenties at most, but likely younger.

This is another example of too much time spent on something insignificant. This makes me wonder why he looks old enough to conclude he is in his late twenties, but also what about him suggests he is likely to be younger? I suggest to outright say he is in his mid-twenties and not draw too much attention to this.

"Hello," the man said.

This is a bit toneless. I guess you did mention that he was smiling so you have implied his tone of voice. Still this seemed a bit lacking.

Cass easily recognized the expression. It was a rare one, but she had seen it several times before.

This last part contradicts itself, how can Aspens expression be rare and seen several times before?

***

Overall commets:

Again my favourite aspect of this story is how you are utilising Cass’s social anxiety. You seem to have a good grasp on it, too, especially how Cass didn’t know how to continue a conversation after just saying “hello” to someone.

You haven’t mentioned anything about Cass like-liking Aspen since 1.1, when you said her heart fluttered at the sight of Aspen. I’m starting to wonder if that was unintentional and if I should stop shipping them LOL ^_^ If it was intentional then I think you have gone too long without hinting at this theme again. But even if there is no love interest, there is something intriguing about their dynamics and you’re doing a good job exhibiting this. I would like to eventually learn some kind of justification for why Aspen is friends with Cass, though. Doesn’t have to be soon but it does need to happen. Aspen seems well adjusted and confident so I need to believe she would commit herself to someone who isn’t so well adjusted and relies on her to such a great extent.

I get the point of the flea market scene now, since it sets up the lockets. You could have described the lockets a lot more. They feature in the title so they're obviously pivotal to the story. Your readers should have a specific idea of what they look like because of this.

I have a logic/disbelief issue, which I think you can fix easily. It seemed kinda too coincidental that they happened upon these lockets. This entire story might not have occurred had they not simply walked past the correct table and caught sight of them. So did fate lead them there? I don’t know, if something happens in a story “just because” I lose interest, because it seems that the characters didn’t do anything to kick the plot off. The way I suggest to fix this is to play more on the fact that Cass is drawn to the locket but do it earlier on. Such as Cass felt drawn to go to the flea market to begin with because of this strange compulsion feeling (perhaps they saw a sign on the way to their hiking trip and Cass demanded to go on a detour to the market (which again would be another break in character and again would emphasise the significance of the strange compulsion feeling). And then when they are at the flea market they could be on their way out when then the strange compulsion draws Cass down one last aisle (another purposeful break in characterisation). Something along those lines would help make it seem that the characters are making choices and driving the story forward, rather than the story just happening to the characters.

One last point (kind of mirroring what Biscuits said) there seems to be a slight disconnect with how the dream scene links to the lockets. They're like two separate incidents, so it comes across that you have set up two individual plot points when they should probably be more cohesive? I'm assuming they are linked in some way, perhaps I'm wrong! I'm not sure I explained this very well so let me know if you want me to elaborate.

Hopefully my review doesn’t make it seem like I didn’t enjoy 2.2. The amount of feedback I provide usually scales with how much potential I see!

-Zoom

Mageheart says...

Thanks for the review!

I'm going to do what I did with the previous review and focus on your overall comments instead of the nitpicks. (Mainly because I've got to be somewhere soon and I still need to reply to Biscuit's review.)

I admit I'm taking a lot of Cass' social struggles from my own. I don't think they're to the same extent, but I've felt similarly when I'm in big groups of people and have to do things without some authority figure there.

Cass definitely has a crush on Aspen! It hasn't come up in the story or on my wall yet, but I've mentioned it in the thread I have for this story - the end goal is for the friendship between Cass and Aspen to blossom into a romance. (I'm thinking Caspen should be the ship name, but I'm open to suggestions!) I'll try explaining their friendship a little more in the future chapters, but it might take awhile before I can find a good point to fit it in.

Oooh, I didn't think of that! The reason I had Aspen want to go to the flea markets was to show how good at giving the other person what they want, but I do like the idea of them going there because of Cass. I promise you'll get an explanation for why things happened the way they did in future chapters, but it's going to be a long time before you get that specific answer.

I understand! I'm planning on linking the two parts of the story together better in future drafts, but the lockets and the dreams are very much connected.

Thanks again for the review!

Zoom says...

CASPEN 2018 CONFIRMED

MY HEART

Mageheart says...

YUP THEY'RE CANON JUST NOT YET

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Thu Jul 26, 2018 4:24 pm

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ExOmelas wrote a review...

Heyo, here is my attempt at being more articulate than I would have been on the pad... I'll let you be the judge...

Alright, here we go with the plot! I guess that's fair enough since this was the second half of a chapter; it wouldn't have been necessary for something to have advanced by the time I finished the last one if I'd been reading it all together.

To be fair, I think this might feel bigger than it is because it's our first plot element to relate to the title. Whether that is why or not, it feels big, so the reader is feeling probably what you want them to feel, I just don't want to overemphasise it in my own head. This is fairly close to just a repeat of what happened in the car with the music. A weird feeling came over Cass, she didn't understand it. She was compelled to action this time, which I believe is knew to be fair. She then felt a bit weird about telling Aspen and actually oddly it maybe is different that Aspen doesn't seem to have had the same draw. I assumed that was why she got a locket too, but maybe it was just to make Cass happy since they had matching jewellery and that's always fun to have with your friends.

But, like, is it a plot point that Aspen doesn't have the same urge? If so, that should maybe be mentioned. As in, Cass wondered why it hadn't affected Aspen. If not, then it should maybe be dealt with why if they're having similar dreams they're not having the same reaction to the music and the locket.

The main point of this is that we don't actually have any new information to go on, but you did say that the hike is where it really all goes down, so I await that with much anticipation!

Hope this helps,
Biscuits

Mageheart says...

Thanks for the review!

That's a relief! I think one of the hardest things about reviewing stories for lms is how broken up the chapters tend to be, and how hard it is to judge how they work with the plot - something I've noticed when writing reviews for other lms stories.

I didn't think of that! I really do need to emphasize the differences. Right now, it's just Cass who's getting the weird feelings and is being drawn to the lockets. I can't say too much because it'll ruin the mystery of the lockets and the dreams, but Cass and Aspen have already brought up a difference in one of the previous chapters - Aspen's been having hers for a far shorter time. Cass is further along with whatever's going on, which is something I really need to work into the story more.

I hope I can do the hike justice!

Thanks again. <3

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The Three Lockets [Chapter 2.2]

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