On the road outside a city, an angry boy meets a lost spirit and sparks a recollection.
"I have seen your heart before, in Linnuis," The spirit recalls.
"I’ve never been to that place," the boy responds.
You were born to a family that told you the world was just. I do not recall what it is like to be a child, to trust others with the answers to such important questions, but that is what children must do, to gather a sense of the world. You were told stories of villains brought low, and heroes overcoming impossible odds. It was a comfort.
It was a lie!
It was a tale. It was a story that you were told of what the world should be, but is not. And no matter how much they might want that tale to be true, the ones who told it could not make that happen. So yes, it was a lie.
It’s not fair! That they should promise such things and then betray them, that this….that this should happen at all. It’s…
It is not fair. That is what I told them, in Linnuis. Justice is not something that simply happens, like rain or sunshine. Justice is fought for, bled for, and killed for. And even when it is inflicted, even then it might be but a spare moment in a grim eternity.
It’s less than I was promised then, but more than I’ve seen since I left home. Everything here is rotten.
Understand. You were promised a joy that can never be, an excuse for complacency and compromises. Set it aside. When you are expecting the taste of a sumptuous feast, you forget the simple bounties of life. A soul does not starve without luxury. If you seek justice, if you hunger for it, you will find it.
Like rain or sunshine?
No! Do not expect justice to fall from the sky. Sew it, reap it, and plant it again. Feed yourself on it and grow strong. Remember it by enacting it, not by telling tales of it. When weeds grow up to threaten your crop, burn them out.
You said you saw me in Linnuis?
Your heart, yes.
Where is Linnuis? I have never heard of it.
Gone.
Why?
When weeds grow up to threaten your crop, burn them out, whatever the cost.
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125,009 Literary Works • 672,837 Reviews
Hi there - I found this rather intriguing and it ended up totally different to how I expected... the opening line was blunt and simplistic, yet concise in what the scenario occuring was - straight to the point.
. It's confusing but awesome 
Then it suddenly flipped, there was lots of mention of second person pronoun "you" making it seem particularly direct and personal. This was rather unexpected and I like how it's just so sudden and surprising.
All the rest of it... was interesting although I didn't quite understand it completely... A lot of your writing created much ambiguity and I'm curious to know whether that was intended.
From my perspective it seemed like the "angry boy" is having a thought process - lying to this ghost... the idea of him going to Linnuis would perhaps threaten him - alike "threaten your crop"... So he must "burn them out" of his mind for his own protection. At least that's how I see it, but I hope that you can write more and clarify all this because I'm genuinely really interested
Hey there Rubric, Edel here for a short review,
Overall most of the important things have already been mentioned. Such as wether or not there should or should not be quotation marks. I do think it wold be easier to follow along if there were, even though you already have a good flow going on.
Anyway, this was very inspiring and I am particularly found of the ghost's last sentence.
"When weeds grow up to threaten your crop, burn them out, whatever the cost." Maybe it's the fact that the ghost rhymed, and for some reason whenever ghost rhyme you are left feeling haunted.
You did a wonderful job! Two thumbs up! I hope to read more in the near future, keep writing!
-Edelweiss-
Your story is very unique and well put together. It also has potential to become more. It is clear you have thoughts on issues such as justice. You portray a statement on justice in society very well especially within the dynamic of a ghost and a boy. The story is nicely brought back in a circle. The story is brief but in the way that it says what it needs and no more. There could be some expansion but I would urge you to only go slightly further if you choose. The unspecified dialogue reminds me of Hemingway's style. To conclude, this is a well thought out piece that addresses a very important aspect of society. I like the way it critiques the way children are raised. Your choice of characters and dialogue is successful. I do agree with UntamedHeart173 about specifying the dialogue more. Thank you for the thought provoking work!
This is definitely a very interesting work. I like the way you began it but I did feel that it was a bit unfinished. Who are your characters? I felt like I didn't really know what was happening in this short. That's not necessarily a bad thing, of course. You can always add to this. In fact, I'd love if you would because I enjoyed reading it. Anyways, keep up!
Colly
Hello Remington38 here for a review,
So I would like to start off with saying how interesting this was. A very interesting idea and I would love to the rest of it because I am going to assume there will be a rest? So in the first few lines you use quotations for the dialogue, but then it just goes away and becomes the dialogue separated by paragraph. The only thing I suggest is to make sure in being consistent with the quotations. I found the wisdom that this ghost has was interesting and so was everything it was saying. Over all very interesting and well written.