Young Writers Society

Hello, Rosendorn~
This is MergSword here with a review!

Grammar Issues and Other Errors
Let's see, I don't believe I found any visible grammar issues or major errors. I'm usually big on capitalization, even though it isn't important. And then I looked at the description of the poem, that non-capitalization was intentional, hahaha.

The Pros of this Poem
I love the way this poem captures emotion, and tells the reader how to accept the loss of a treasured loved one. It is very considerate to write a poem from the heart, meant for people going through hard times, especially as they struggle to accept that someone they truly loved is gone. As NeverNeverLandGirl said, I loved the way you closed the poem with a message of hope, that somewhat comforts the reader.

The Cons of this Poem
I couldn't find any cons of this poem. Although, poetry is usually meant to be like this, I did have trouble comprehending what you were trying to say in some parts. It's nothing to change, really, in fact, the words that you used were very creative, I guess it's my fault that I can't comprehend, in fact the words you used made the poem even better. (I'm asking myself why I put this in the con section of the review o-o)

My Overall Opinion
This poem was very beautiful, and I could tell you put much thought into it. The poem was an inspiring message to those who struggled to accept that someone passed away, but in the end, it was going to be alright. I will remember this poem.

~Keep on Writing!

Here for a review.
Your poem reminded me of Michael Lee's poem, Pass On. And I love that poem. I loved your style of using the one, two, and three in a list of what they need to do after tragedy has struck. Most times when people are hurt and broken down by death of a loved one, they need the step-by-step instructions to get out of their fuzzy minds and broken hearts. It's hard to get through to them, and seems like you knew how to because you've felt it before. And I'm sorry if so.
I loved the way you closed the poem with hope. It's not a light subject, but as long as you give them someone to hold onto it can keep them going. And it's a good thing to let them know that life is still possible living. It may not be alright, but worth surviving. If they remember anything from the poem, it should be just that.
When it comes to the third thing, I think it's the word them that's throwing me off. I understand what you are meaning to say, but I think it would almost reach to a wider audience if you just told them to write it out. Write how they felt, what they want to tell, what they want differently, etc. Writing is a perfect coping skill and I think that just writing about them is almost too narrow.
The ';' after comfort should be a period, and I think that '(there never is)' should be it's own line rather then in parenthesis.
Overall, I really enjoyed the poem. Truly. I think it bleeds emotion and that's what every poem is. You captured the pain and let others know that they aren't alone and that they can make it through much like you have.
If that isn't a superpower I don't know what is.
-NeverNeverLandGirl

Good short satire. Remembering love ones who pass is hard when time has passed.

Touching. Thanks a lot. I needed this as my closest friend passed away about two months ago. It was really hard to pull myself together.

Thank you.