Obselete Absolution

Wow. This is quite an interesting concept. It's very dark, and I think you did a great job executing the darkness in this piece in a gentle way. My favorite lines are definitely the first verse, I feel like it really sums up the entire poem.
If anything, I felt that the second verse was a little bit unclear. I would suggest adding a couple words here and there (adding an "I" or "You" in front of the second line, etc) and also changing the tenses of the last two lines so that they're the same. I think that this will just help the poem flow more easily as a whole.
Otherwise, this was executed very well, and I look forward to reading more of your work! Thanks so much for writing!

Hi there,

So I got to say, I'm half and half with this poem. I can't decide whether I don't like it, or I don't like it because I can't fully understand it.

For me, I get the feeling there's a relationship. The female feels like she's useless and she tries her best to please the man, but he doesn't need her.

I really don't get this bit

'Purple eyes pretty
Cry for help'

I feel like you've got the structure of the sentence messed up a bit, it isn't grammatically correct from what I can tell. Did you mean 'Pretty purple eyes cry for help.'?

Maybe I'm just too narrow minded but it doesn't really do anything for me, it feels to jumbly and abstract to work as a narrative poem.

Good job writing it though, I can tell your intentions were to make us work hard to understand it.

Keep writing,

H.L.P

although i am not so sure what this poem is about, i have to say that i like it.
care to explain ?

Very interesting poem.

I get a feeling of malice from it, dark, but definitely not ominous, very open.

"Wants to love

Called me a whore

-

Purple eyes pretty

Cry for help

Wit won’t save you now"

These lines are great, and convey a lot of emotions and thoughts and feelings in the short span of five lines. I don't love the poem, I hate it, and that's why I like it, which means you did a great job of getting your point across.

Great work!

Thank you BloodinkSeesFootage!

I see, I love doing my own interpretation on poetry! Its really have a deep meanings, indeed some are really intriguing me.

Wants to love

Called me a whore

Whoa ok, let me see if I can review this without looking for my English text book. Which is buried somewhere in my room of trash. Why are your poems so deep? And abstract? That terrible readers like me can't understand but still likes it? Let us continue!

I'm really not sure what is is about, is this about a girl whom had been broken down at some point during her life? An artist perhaps? The whole poem had a really strong sense of desperation and helplessness in it, there's also an undercurrent of anger. I know you are striving to tell the readers something, but I have no idea.

Still, good job! But could you tell me what this is about?

-S.s