I am looking in the mirror.
I suppose I have a... snubby nose
And its covered in freckles;
But its straight
ish. Which is good.
Brown eyes.
I like them.
They're a bit small, though.
And I have eyelashes that are a bit pale.
But I like my eyebrows, though.
And my lips. But they're too thin.
Teeth....could be straighter.
Rosy cheeks. I've always had them.
They say I have my mothers skin;
I can't see how they tell.
It looks the same as everyone else's.
Away from the mirror.
Random Harry Potter fan arts I have drawn
There's the one of Ginny
In the chamber of secrets.
I like that one.
Took me ages.
And then there's pictures of my friends
In France.
And pictures of Aborigines.
And school books. I don't want to look at them.
Body spray.
Because otherwise I'd smell funny.
Socks all over the floor. I like socks.
Books everywhere, too.
Artemis Fowl is open on my bed.
Oh,
And there's a deodorant bottle under my feet.
I'm rolling it about.
It feels cold.
Because I've not got any socks on.
They're all on the floor.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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125,018 Literary Works • 672,861 Reviews
ok It's me again sorry. I read the first bit bt that's it and i need to write this so that they can say i've done a review and i can actually put something on.
You are very pretty and your nose is certainly not snubby
that's a funny word.
snubby
hehe
i'm not going to read any others because i know you will be embarassed and you don't want me to
love from me x
There's a lot of physical description here, which is fine, but for much of it, I don't see the point. I like the part about the mother's skin at the end of the first stanza; it was something unique to your point of view, rather than something anyone might notice by looking in the mirror. And things like that make poems special.
The second stanza was similar; it's a long list of what's in the room, but it's all things I and anyone else might expect to be in a teenager's room. All tied together, what does everything show about that person?
I like the last few lines because it's not an observation (and while observations are very valid things, I don't know if they can support a whole poem just themselves), but more of a commentary. It's something personal and more connecting to that person than lists of items are.
I like the bit 'They say I have my mothers skin;
I can't see how they tell.
It looks the same as everyone else's.' That made me smile
Errm... apart from that I don't really know what to say, I don't think i got it.