Published September 8, 2011
On rainy days, I cannot smile.
The sun's been gone for quite a while.
But when I see your smiling face,
And those eye's start to twinkle,
I undergo a change of pace;
So let's let the rain sprinkle.
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139,444 Literary Works • 672,564 Reviews
This was cute! Great rhyme although it was a bit short, but it was perfect anyway.
This was a nice and simple little poem. Very quick but there's nothing wrong with that.
THIS made my day (my night actually...)
Hahahaha, you know you should control your language. I personally have nothing against it but we have little ones wandering about. Just click 'edit' if you need anything changed or edited.
Well, this was a useless review so I won't be wasting your time any longer.
Keep writing!
- Mikko.
It's a sweet poem. I like it a lot. Nice job!
Hello PurpleEurope,
Regardless, your point comes across quite clearly. It's all very cute and sweet and makes me smile.
Hehe, I actually like your title for this piece which was what drew me to it ^^; I think it's cute and it suits the poem itself. So we both know the rhyme scheme changes in the middle of it
eye's - should be 'eyes' you want plural, not possessive/contraction
You want a semicolon, or a period here. Your last line is a complete sentence; it can stand alone. This means a comma in this case would be too weak.
Great job ^^ And also you can always go back to edit it, just click on the "edit" button at the top right corner.
Just realized i effed up the rhyme scheme.... shiitttt