Published December 16, 2005
Teenager Recollections
12-16-05
SteamPain! FearBlood! Anger-angst, lost-found, groping-shrieking something dark.
A tune of incoherency blares trumpet-pound Pond-Pollution,
but the shadow is here!-Fear! Fear fear fear my world burns, future drowns
fairy tales shatter friends stab (my smile is my ugliest feature) incoherency blares
blares blares (my memory is skewed lost found skewed skewed sliced crosswise,
and who am I?
Schizm, slide, reverberate and hide
instigation, torture, investigation, smells!
Love-loss lost fear peer-pressure
words, my words suck, you suck, I suck, we stand united as
The Guilty.
Hatred-me-you-mindworm twists! Ideas shine, run together and rise
Scientific method laughs bad breath in my face, breathe to calm, fail to stand,
my God she’s beautiful and I’m still in school but it’s been
forty minutes since I’ve last realized it, where oh where
does my tumbling life go?
Stagnation, emancipation, slaveation, food
yumyumyum.
Rising high my world it’s a trampoline it’s a tale it’s magnificent, I’m God
flop. God. flop. The stars of smashing your head shine and sizzle
I want to fuck, to feel, stare in a mirrow and delve.
I’m ready for truth, manic newspaper, believe me I am
propaganda-continualizes, brain neutralizes, idea-cauterizer
fun castrater, and I’m young so my future my future my future
calls. Ball-peen hammer smash calls, peak-oil theory, global warming,
caring and vomiting, ejaculating and worship, whoreship, cutting
flirting, screaming, bleating.
Schizm is my TV zoomy, roly-poly, people come and go,
bind to me and you, sipping tepid stew and I say
“it’s the best thing ever” when really I want to say:
“GodDAM YOU, YOU’RE THE WORST COOK EVER
I crave, CRAVE” and I stand up and rip open my shirt to reveal bulging mega-dude muscles on an oiled chest, and my voice is deep and cave-man like,
“DUMPLINGS!” you know, with the nice
red sauce, but I don’t say it.
And at night, I dream of blackness
and in the day, I dream of nightmares,
the war drums of savages and pasty
“Da buck stops here, welcome to da UP, eh!’ Yoopers,
my God, I hate them like fat kid hates the starving, and vice versa,
and I hate laughter and fun, because life is total evil,
stagnation dredges, tea dregs,
tell me that this address is real, ‘cuz
I don’t believe it, and it extends back
to my naked, blinking, 10th grade bruised blind birth,
screaming gargoyles divine,
I love you, religious right, ‘cuz
you’re cute!
And the world is ending, yes.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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...I respect you for that
lol....I like all your stuff, pretty much, but this was definitely one of me favourites.
Yeah, I think that bit may be the best stanza I've ever written. And I don't know how to quote, either...but I also don't want to learn, become I'm a curmudgeonly old man.
=D> Another fantastic piece! Loved it!
The only thing I didn't like (lol - the only thing....mark me!) was the 'yumyumyum'....don't know why, i just didn't. I see why you put it in there, because it blends with the rushed, speaking kind of tone of the poem...but i just felt it was a bit too...soft, I guess.
One of my favourite bits, one of the bits that made me smile, was:
“GodDAM YOU, YOU’RE THE WORST COOK EVER
I crave, CRAVE” and I stand up and rip open my shirt to reveal bulging mega-dude muscles on an oiled chest, and my voice is deep and cave-man like,
“DUMPLINGS!” you know, with the nice
red sauce, but I don’t say it.
(I haven't got a fucking clue how to 'quote' lol)
*wipes eyes* love it. Absolutely fucking brilliant :thumb:
this was very good. mmmmm...nice and gripping, just like I like it. I've never read your stuff, but I wouldn't mind reading it again. It really would do good a poetry slam. great job!
oh and I think it would make for a great song
Wow. I just love your work. Nice rhythm in this one. And it speaks to me. Hate it when people use cuz instead of 'cause though, but I’ll forgive you.
It's all very interesting, although there are some references I don't get. Points!
Your poems never cease to entertain me. Great fun to say aloud, frantic, frenzied words stuck together worked very well.
Good rythm, good meter... I tend to think the dark death poetry is really overdone. but s'cool
I'll leave the nIce dreams peom alone.
(which, if you don't get what I mean, is a reference to a Cheech and Chong Movie.)