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Scrap #1

by Phoenixfire


“Everyone knows about death, right? But what people don’t talk about, or even think about, really, is what’s between it. The lines between death and life are not as clear as they seem. It is in the between, when those lines blur, that you gain real power. Those who see that in between never come back—their souls are already on the journey to whatever destination is their lot. It is those who can look outside the seemingly rigid lines of life and death who are more dangerous than anything on this earth. Or even out of it.”

~ Inmate #7089, Montana Psychiatric Institute for the Mentally Unwell


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894 Reviews


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Sat Aug 01, 2020 10:11 am
HarryHardy wrote a review...



Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.

First Impression: Hmm....well that was a really, really short piece there. Makes quite a lot of sense though. Some real deep meaning hidden inside even such a tiny piece. Its really nice in the kind of message that it tries to convey. And not sure there's too much for me to comment on but I shall try my best.

Anyway let's get right to it,

“Everyone knows about death, right? But what people don’t talk about, or even think about, really, is what’s between it. The lines between death and life are not as clear as they seem. It is in the between, when those lines blur, that you gain real power. Those who see that in between never come back—their souls are already on the journey to whatever destination is their lot. It is those who can look outside the seemingly rigid lines of life and death who are more dangerous than anything on this earth. Or even out of it.”


Okay no grammar errors that I can spot but I think that using the word that there instead of "who" would allow that sentence just flow a little bit better overall. Besides that though this is really nicely written.

Aaand that's about it. A really short review for this very short piece.

Overall: So from what I can understand it is talking about maybe those that commit murders? I'm not a hundred percent sure if its that or just about ghosts. I believe it is in fact about murderers and those that do in fact not see the line between life and death and something about how blurring that one can cause people to be very dangerous. Or maybe its just a really cool opening to a novel about the supernatural. I'm not too sure but that's my two cents. And overall it is a really well written piece.

As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.

Stay Safe
Harry




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Mon Jun 27, 2011 2:56 pm
ZannaShepherd says...



Interesting concept, I really like your writing style. I didn't find any gramatical errors, so thumbs up to that! Good luck, have fun. and keep up the great work!
~Zanna Shepherd




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Sun Jun 26, 2011 10:31 pm
Phoenixfire says...



Wow, it's been forever since I've reread this. Good point--and something I'll change if it ever goes any further. Thanks for the input!




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Sun Jun 26, 2011 9:33 pm
VivielTwixt wrote a review...



But what people don’t talk about, or even think about, really, is what’s before it.


There is no between death. You mean between life and death, or just before death.

The idea is interesting. Once between the line of life and death, one need not worry about living or about dying so they're free in a way. I'd like to see this used in a novel. It would make an interesting story.





The very worst use of time is to do very well what need not be done at all.
— Benjamin Tregoe