Mom Got Her Wings

Hey this is PusheenTheCat and I wanted to say that this would go really well with my sister

because she loves these types of poems with wings and everything that goes with it. Now back

to the review I would like to say that this is one of the other kinds of poems that I like because

it makes them look like they are real and I know that one day this will be real. I liked the way

you said "'But I just feel like I could have done more'" and that right there is what I like about

this it makes you think that you could have done more but in the end it turns out that what you

did was good enough for her. I would also like to say that I wan't expecting the way you said

'"The man above has called her and she is finally resting peacefully.'" at first I thought wow

this didn't go very far but it turns out that it did and that you were saying she got her wings

to early and that is what made her rest, but I still don't understand what you are trying to

say here so if you could tell me when you respond. You are a very good and talented writer

and I see that you are new so I would like to say this is very much better than what I did

when I first came here. Keep up the good work and keep writing.


This was PusheenTheCat and thanks for writing this and I hope you write more in the future.

Hey Harry here for a review, lets start off with I am sorry for your loss and I hope you recover soon. Next I loved this poem and it made me feel your pain and sadness with losing someone you love more than anything else. I hope that everything you do will help you remember the good times. First off you can make everything in the beginning of the line capitalized, shows that you can make those words bolder and more available to the reader. Another thing you can do is add some commas in this, it allows the reader to stop for a split second and think about what you are saying, maybe get some feelings out so they can understand what you are feeling about losing your mom. Also I would get more rhymes in, in the end you rhyme reward with forward but through the rest of the poem there is nothing that rhymes and that kind of throws the reader off for a few seconds. Also try to add stanzas to your poem, Stanzas are like this,

Mom finally got her wings

even though it was too early.

The man above has called her

and she is finally resting peacefully.
****
I know she says

that I should not feel guilty

that she was denied the life

that was given to me

But I just feel like

I could have done more

to keep her here a little longer

and end with a satisfying reward.
Other than that the poem was great and I would keep up the good work with expressing your feelings in your work.
GOOD WORK AND HAPPY WRITING