Each syllable pronounced and with care and exactness. A sweet, flowery smile sprang onto the kindergarten teachers face. “That is exactly how long our school year will be! This will be so exciting, children!”
180 days?!?! No, that’s too long!
I try to count it in my head: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 3, 6, 7, 3, 1… WHAT IS AFTER TEN? Oh gosh, 180 is so high that I can’t even count to it. I will be all old and gross and weird by the time I finish kindergarten!
That can’t be! Why?!?! I have barely sprung into life and then there’s SCHOOL! There is no possible way I can keep this dreadful news to myself, so I lean over to the girl next to me, Jenna.
I whisper, “You know, by the time we finish kindergarten, we’ll all be old and gross and weird, right?”
A sharp gasp, indicating that she has probably taken the news quite hard. There’s hyperventilation and finally the sobs.
“Jenna?” the teacher looks over, smile still etched onto her face, “What’s wrong, sweetie?”
“WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!” is screamed. This alone sends the entire kindergarten population into a mass frenzy of confusion, tears, and most terrifyingly: boogers. Fast as, well, as fast as they could possibly be, the doors close with a hiss, and the fog starts rolling in. The teachers already have their protective suits on and mechanical claws reach down from the ceiling and gingerly drop cookies into the grasping hands of the children. Pretty soon, the snarling stops, munching on cookies is heard and, the entire kindergarten population is snoring.