Published August 5, 2011
I had my mind set on something
A dream that now seems so far out of my reach
So far that it's out of my eyesight
Out of my hearing
And out of my dreams
There was a time where I had everything planned out
I had complete and total control over everything that happened in my life
Nothing could ever catch me by surprise
My eyes were open
My ears were clear
And nothing,
Absolutely nothing
Brought fear
But now I wonder what I have
Now I ask myself what's changed
I see everyone around me growing up
I know everyone around me is getting better
But not me
What do I need right now
Am I searching for some love interest
Or just missing some important part of me
I don't know what I need to search for
Hope for
Dream for
Pray for
I don't know what I need
Could it be that I've already found it?
Hidden somewhere deep inside of me?
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139,347 Literary Works • 672,539 Reviews
*blush*
Awww thank you guys! It's been such a while since I've even added poetry on here, I'm glad that I've broke my posting fast and had so many great responses.
Wow, this totally applies to my life right now. Have you read my feelings? My thoughts? This is crazy. I am also stuck in this situation. Wow...
Anyway on to the review. You are telling us a whole lot, not showing. I would probably describe my life right now something like a black void, an empty bucket, a dark, deep hole which has not felt the water of life yet. Something like that. Your poem is very literal. I mean, it's simple, and that's alright. But it could be better. Or could it? Haha
Good luck and keep on writing.
it was great It was a depp poem that had lots of feeling
I love this poem because I can deffinitely relate to it and I think others can as well. It was extremely well written and elegantly described to the reader how the subject almost doubts themself and feels like their missing something that everyone around them understands. Really enjoyed it!
DropsOfSummer
Beautiful! Absolutley beautiful! Your poem has such a deep, strong message that I got it immediatley (which is rare with me and poetry). I love it! I can't find anything to critique! Good job!