Window

I really like the image you have created in my head...the last line is incredibly strong it is exatly what the poem needed in order to have a smooth end...very good.I ould really like to know where all you guys get the inspiration from...wow.

Hi Overdose! Welcome to YWS! I am also new, but I love this place already.
You will feel right at home here!

I love this poem very much, I like how you rhymed your first and last two
sentences.

I like how you said 'every glance sees a shard' it is a good introduction as well
as how 'shard' and 'hard' rhyme. I like that, because it draws me into your poem
a little more. It all makes it sound so much more interesting.
I also like how you said 'cry like the wind,' I think that is a good description, and
it not only adds description, but draws you into the poem more. It sounds so
much more interesting.

I like how you rhymed at the beginning and endings, it makes it sound better
and more interesting - rather than plain and "the usual."

I loved this poem very much, And I did not see any mistakes. You did a very good
job on this. Keep writing!!
~CrossingFlower

I like your way of writing here. The words at the end of each line were simple and rhyming but because i was so totally engrossed it, they did not seem so simple to me. They touched me inside. Every line is different from the first, not really continuing the previous sentence and yet there was still a flow in this poem. "A rock through the window, with justice comes time" I loved this line. It's perfect to end your poem. Keep writing, you're very talented.

Since you're new, I'll take my time to review your poem, but mark my words. I suck at poems
So here it goes:

Every word is a pain; every glance sees a shard,
The framing itself, so indestructibly hard,

I loved this rhyme. They fill out eachother nicely. I love this stanza (dealing them up in stanzas after the rhymes) because it starts out this poem nicely.

To cry like the wind, I’m sure we are heard
Though the window was sealed, to keep out the birds,

Love the metaphore. Cry like the wind. I liked this stanza as well, though the rhyme wasn't the coolest :3 Heard - birds. Bird would have fit better, though it may have somewhat ruined the poem.

When the casing did trial, I knew the real crime,
A rock through the window, with justice comes time.

This stanza surprised me. I was not expecting this. I loved it, though. The rhyme here was cool too, since crime and time fill out eachother. There is not much more for me to say now. So.

Welcome to YWS, and please don't take an overdose

Love, Bob Walker!