Another poem entered in a poetry contest, please give feed back:)
I open my eyes
To look through my list.
I don’t know which to pick,
Release the sighs.
It’s the end of the day
And it’s the last straw.
I need to relax,
My feelings are raw.
I reach for my medicine,
Exploring through my pockets.
I fiddle blindly,
Until I find it.
I pull out the white wire,
And drain.
I close my eyes,
Without any strain.
The rhythm flows through me.
Every beat unravels.
I feel it through my feet.
The lyrics scream,
Through my head.
I open my eyes,
And realize,
Old thoughts are dead.
This music in my antidote,
It gets me by the day.
Note by note.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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125,012 Literary Works • 672,842 Reviews
Nice poem! I like the fact that the poem focuses on what we teenagers do everyday to unravel but you presented something so simple into a dramatic piece. I also like the idea of not spacing it. It gives the effect of a flow of the words and how they are inter-twined. Nice style! Keep it up!
Awesome I really loved it and can't wait to read more. Good luck and Happy Writing!!!
Soulkana<3