This was an amazing poem. Wonderful imagery, sharp humor, and a deep message.
My favorite lines was "Devilish she-twins".
You could use some more punctuation, especially in the first half, but that's a quick fix.
I don't know why, but the last line feels off to me. Maybe if it was just "at the end of your night out" it would sound better? I don't know. But other than that, the poem has a great flow.
I might suggest breaking it into two stanzas, I don't know where, but it feels a bit long to all be one stanza. That might just be me being weird, but it's something to think about.
That's all I can really think to say; it's just too good I guess. Still, I hope this short review helped. : )
-tgirly
Points: 1147
Reviews: 374
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