It's a little short. Feedback please 
Revenge
My one mission.
I stand here, the gun in my hand, ready to exact the revenge I deserve to give. The metal feels cold, icy to the touch. I can feel my whole body trembling.
I can feel my body willing my finger to pull, get it over with, end it. Do I have the will? The strength? Do I want to do this? Is it right? Is it my right to decide the fate of a life?
No, I think. Stop questioning yourself. It is your mission. Your revenge. You have to do it.
I knew I would doubt myself. I knew I would break down like this. I knew I would cry, not be able to do it. But I must. It is my mission. I must complete it. My mission.
I tried again.
Again, I failed.
I fell to my knees. Still pointing the gun, feeling the cold trigger on my sweaty finger. Just pull, my mind kept saying. No! stop, it would say, like a confused teenager deciding what to wear to a date.
I’ve almost done it. I just felt the trigger click where I was exerting pressure on it. I can do it. My mission. I can complete it. I can do it.
I feel it slipping back. With my last strength- I pull. A sound! Then…then… Darkness……….. I…have….Reven…g…..e…!
Again, short, but I didn't want to drag it out and keep repeating myself.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,005 Literary Works • 672,804 Reviews
Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: Overall it was a pretty dark story
again. It was pretty short but I think it managed to get across quite some meaning and a very clear sort of plot in these few words and that means its a great that you've done here. The overall flow of the piece was great and very easy to understand and its just a well written piece.Anyway let's get right to it,
Not the worst start but this one is pretty darn ambiguous so it really is not the catchiest of title and that does not bode too well for the start of a story.
Well that's certainly a nice little description of his situation.
This is a very nice depiction of what it's like to be making such a bid decision in life to be deciding someone's fate and that's a really nice thing to see.
Okay that's not very correct. Usually that click you hear is when the firing pins are released and things go boom. A trigger is not going to make any sort of clicking sound unless you're firing a gun when its empty, it does click when its not empty too but you obviously will never hear that sound over the sound of the much louder gunshot.
Well that's kind of an ambiguous to match the start. Either he collapsed from killing someone or he just killed himself and that would be the stupidest form of revenge ever in my opinion but the hesitation he had would take on a whole new meaning if that was the case so that's something to think about.
Aaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Like I said earlier its got a great meaning that is conveyed in these few words and there is also some really realistic emotions conveyed to us which is amazing. So overall good job with this short story.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Its good, but I would of loved to know what happened before and why it happened.
It's very bland and uninteresting. At the very least, you should have some sort of motive for why your character did what he did.
Your story was short, rense, gripping and very confuseing. It sounds a little bit like he end of a story, more than the whole thing. Perhaps you could make a prequal?
Oh, and was He/she killing themselves? or someone else?
intresting
But what led to this explain please and it too short