The Elderberry Tree

Hey there Firedancer here to review your work. Its funny how you say that english is your second language and you wrote this poem, because we had a foreign exchange student in our english class and she wrote something similar to this poem and there was a tree in it as well. A coincidence no doubt but I find that rather funny.

"Your mature courtesy
was sufficient to dismiss
fire as nothing but the
opposite of water. As simple." I think that you meant "Simple as that." Because As simple does not make any sense. Also I really like this part because of how you talk about fire and water as opposites. I personally am intrigued by opposites, and am always delighted when there is a need to incorporate it into a poem.

Taking into account that english is your second language I would like to point out that the last two lines of your poem are a bit confusing and is hard to understand. i don't know if that is because of the enigmatic style of the poem or simply because you didn't know how to put it.

Overall I liked this poem. Keep up the good work.

Hey Nightnotes! Well I thought this poem was definitely interesting, if not a little vague. Before I actually review though, can I ask what your first language is? Anyway, I'm terrible at foreign language and find the ability your ability to compose a poem in your second language rather impressive.

That being said, this poem could use a little work. The wording isn't great, and the rhythm is just a little "off" the entire time. I'm also not quite sure of the relevance of this specific type of tree; I know it's traditionally been used for medicine, but that's about all. In any case, since it's what you choose to end with, I feel as though there should be some relevance there.

In any case, this was a good poem, but the flow could have been a little less stiff. Keep writing, and best wishes. xxx