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She is Me

by Namiyuki

Why does she hate herself? Why can’t she love herself? Why does she destroy herself? Why does she torment herself? Why can’t she be happy for herself? Why does she lie to herself? Why does she not accept herself? She looks in the mirror only to repeat words of hate towards herself. She is blind by the darkness she holds onto. She cannot accept who she is. She hides herself wanting to change who she is. She changes her hair and she changes her clothes. She smiles, she laughs, she tries to fool herself. She is naïve. She is childish. She doesn’t stand up for herself. She is envious. She is discouraged. She is pitiful. She is scared. She is sad. She is angry. She is dark. She is me.

She wishes for help from above, but she loses faith. She is broken. She is forgotten. Her self-loathing sings its song the loudest when alone. She is me. She is the girl I see everyday in the mirror. She is that shadow that follows me when I am at my brightest, she appears besides me as a reminder ‘you are broken and until you can accept yourself I’ll always be there.’

My demon that is me, my angel that has yet to appear. I am she and she is me. 

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98 Reviews

Points: 782
Reviews: 98

Fri Jul 05, 2019 2:39 pm
shieldmaiden wrote a review...

Really nice piece of work. I love your play on words "I am she and she is me"! It is so beautiful and I believe that every girl in this entire word can relate with this poem. We all feel this way at some point (or all the time) and I'm glad that you've brought this issue to light. I wish there was some way we could easily accept ourselves, flaws and all, and still retain that desire to improve and be better without tearing ourselves down. Striving to be a better person is always a high goal and one never easily attainable. I think we all lose ourselves along the way. My favorite part that you wrote is - "She is that shadow that follows me when I am at my brightest". Very touching!!!

Please keep posting! I can't wait to read more of your work.


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562 Reviews

Points: 14535
Reviews: 562

Fri Jul 05, 2019 6:17 am
FlamingPhoenix wrote a review...

Hello, FlamingPhoenix here with a review for you on this lovely day, and to help get this work out the green room.

Okay let's start with the review shall we.
So the only thing that I picked up is that you repeated a lot of the same words, like, herself. Some of the lines you used with that can work with out it. And it makes the poem feel less repetitive. And the reader will enjoy it more.
I liked the way you said 'She is me.' in the poem, that was better, it was a little spread out before you repeated the word again, so maybe try and do that is the word, herself.

Okay other than that I really liked this.
Your emotion was very, very strong, and it really touched me, because I have felt this way many times, even to this day sometimes. So I really understand what you are talking about here, and things will get better.

I also really like the flow here. Your punctuation is put in the right places, allowing this that have a good flow, and it allows the reader to enjoy what you have written here.

Now this poem isn't written in the normal poem structure, and when I first saw it I thought it wasn't going to flow as well, and it wasn't really going to work. But you have proved me wrong and this works really well, the read as enjoyable.

Another thing that I really liked, is the name you chose for this work, first is really fits the poem you have written, another thing is that the name is what made me come and read your work, it just pulled me in, and I really like works that do that. So amazing job.

Well that it from me for now, I'm really glad I read and reviewed your work, it was a lot of fun, and I hope I will get to read more of your works soon, because your a very good writer. Post again soon on YWS and have a great day or night ether one.

Your friend
Reviewing with a fiery passion.

Life is about losing everything.
— Isabel Allende