Published October 17, 2008
"Oh, my dearest Sherry how I miss you.
No words can replenish the words the emptiness I try so hard to hide
With you I knew I had a friend forever deep inside
I remember the moments we shared together
and laugh about times when you used to nip at my ankle
as I tried to escape from your playful bite
You were such a monster all a wrinkle
I recall knowledge you brought me along with the wrongs and the right
My how the years seem to have flown by so fast
not ever knowing where you are or where I saw you last
At times when I felt so alone ,You crept into my bed and put your head on my chest
and licked my open hand with such an empathy to know
It put Me at ease and allowed me to rest
Or when I returned from school and there you were in the window!
Paw patting against the tainted glass,tail wagging in excited ecstasy
That sweet look on your face knowing you loved me ,that i could see
I sometimes wonder, 'How did you know?' Was it an instinct within you?
or was it a simple act of kindness to get me through
I may never know why But what you did for me
contributed to who I am today and for that i was proud to be
If what seemed so short lived your owner and your friend!
What more than these words can one say?
Except that I am sure you were a heavenly God send
In all that i do and all that I am, I'm reminded of you
And how I once had a pup who loved and brought comfort to me on each lonesome day
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Thank you very much SEA!
lol i feel like an idiot for not seeing those obvious flaws you mentioned!
but I shall now amend that thanks to you!
And thanks for relating to this poem I thought i t was only me 'Cuz most people think it silly or weird to write a poem about your DOG!
lol
but thank again
you made me glad I did it!
So.. to your poem. I thought it was really good, and I could relate to it.
Always capitalize proper nouns. I did it for you in bold. The line I have completely bolded didn't really make sense to me. I think you need to connect the first part of the second line and the first line. So then you would have,
"Oh, my dearest Sherry how I miss you.
No words can replenish the..." It just flows better that way. I really like the second line.
In the first line, I don't think you need "now." If you feel that you can't get rid of it, then I would move it between "I" and "remember"
Don't need to capitalize "you." I would get rid of the first "and" and replace it with a comma. Then I would add an "and" between "bed" and "put" So it would say, "At times when I felst so alone, you crept into my bed and put your..." Love this part BTW.
"Wagging" has two "g"s in the middle. I would leave out the "ecstasy" and change "excited" to "exitement"
I would say, "I sometimes wonder, 'How did you know?' Was it an instinct within you?"
You've got creative liscense on this one.
Again, this was a very good poem. Just capitalize your pronouns and the beginning words of each line.
-Sea-