Published November 22, 2006
These three are technically separate poems, but they have a single inspiration and were written within minutes of each other. Why separate triplets?
Monotony,
The metronomes rhythm continues,
No crescendo,
Nor diminuendo,
The mechanical heart beat
of humanities inhumanity.
Homogeneity,
It is the same
It is the same
It is the same,
The same as before
The same as afterward,
When cut it bleeds itself
When in love it loves itself,
The same as always.
Heterogeneity is it's anathema
Inspired by myself,
Arts infinite feedback loop
Turning beauty
Into cancer mass.
Soulless white noise
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,736 Literary Works • 675,643 Reviews
I like them. There were some spelling/grammar errors in a couple places that you might want to fix... the one in the last line of the first poem especially, as it confuses the meaning somewhat. I really liked the first one for its metronome image and musical theme. In the second one I thought the structure was interesting and different (in a good way!) and I liked the way it worked with the first poem but was laid out differently. The last one had some great swirling words, lots of interesting words all next to each other without lots of fillers. It was confusing, and hard to connect to the other ones - I think you should working on giving it more of a connection to the other two - but the words were very nice, and they sounded great together. The last lines of all three were fantastic, you seem to have a gift for last lines. This is really good stuff! Keep writing!