Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.
To my dearest daughter Opaline, 25/3/1790
If you have received this letter then that must mean that the prophecy
is true. I gave this letter to Lord Flint knowing full well that he
would take you as his slave if I died. There are so many things that
I wish to say but I only have this one piece of paper to write on.
Your father died three months before you were born then at your
birth a prophet came to me and said these exact words:
"Reborn is the Angel from a life of sorrow. Death awaits
a lovers reunion. Beware the red flecked grey eyes of a
dark man. For he is your lover that will doom your life.
Hate the blonde haired, blue eyed wonder. For he wishes
to bring nothing but pain. Your life is delicate for you
have died. Now your life lives in your dreams. Death
awaits the Angel's lips. To finish the job of which he
missed. Pale is he who loves you so but Death to thee
he is always so."
That was three days ago but still... I shall be watching over you
for I believe my time shall come soon.
I'll love you always,
Your Mother, Evelyn Jane Dawn.
Evelyn watched as her last teardrops dried, staining the page. Then, she folded the letter and slid it into an envelope, sealed it then addressed it to Opaline Marie Dawn. Finally she handed it to the slave that worked for Lord Flint. Sighing, she left to go to see her Mistress, Lady Topaz. That was the last anyone saw of young Evelyn 'Ever' Jane Dawn.
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Hey, Xanthe here
I really enjoyed this chapter. I really liked how you started off with the letter, I expected it to be Opaline reading it at first but I like that it was actually her mother reading over it. It was a very good opening chapter. The bit with the prophecy was done great, it had that mystical feel to it. I really want to know who this guy is now. XD.
To be honest, I cant see anything wrong with it.
Overall, I really like your writing style. Your chapter was really interesting and I love the plot. I would like to read more of your work and I hope to see the next chapter up soon.
Keep writing!
This intrigues me and it is masterfully written. I really enjoyed the prophecy as it sounded poetic and it broke away from the voice of the mother. That brings me to that, I enjoy how you incorporated the three different voices and mixed them well together. I'm hoping to see more of that type of fluidity in the next chapter that I can't wait to sink my teeth into. All in all, it sounds wonderful and has me wanting more.
cool! this looks really neat!
This is really good. It really gets the reader pulled in and craving more. And I love the unique names you gave the characters. I don't really have any recommendations except for you to keep writing.
After reading the prologue, I think this is a great continuation. Great job captivating the reader's attention and making them eager to read more. Write on and I can't wait to read more of your literary works!