Published December 27, 2005
Deleted
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
141,413 Literary Works • 674,393 Reviews
Since you were the last person to give me a review (and perhaps the only one to give *gasp* constructive criticism on) a song and since a quick scroll revealed this is the only song on the first page with no reviews, I thought I'd go ahead and review it.
I really liked this. The first verse threw me off a bit. I'm not quite sure who's busy dangerously thinking. A subject pronoun may help there. And I didn't like the wealth line.
In the second verse, it says "Trying to do their best" but what are they trying to do their best at?
Good job, keep it up! :thumb: