z

Young Writers Society



Scars

by Lucky_Duck


**Sorry about formatting, this has been transferred from a Word doc.

Character List:

ALEX: main character: a young boy in his late teens to mid-20’s

LINDSAY: one of ALEX’s girlfriends and around the same age as ALEX

MOM: ALEX’s naïve mother

DAD: MOM’s husband and ALEX’s father.

GIRL 1: a girl from ALEX’s past

GIRL 2: a girl from ALEX’s past

GIRL 3: a girl from ALEX’s past

Scene I

At rise:

There is nothing on stage save a small loveseat sofa in center and a worn armchair (or box) downstage left. There are two doorframes: one is a deep red and the other an eggshell white. A spotlight appears to reveal ALEX sitting on the armchair (or box). He is shirtless.

ALEX

Ever since I left home, I’ve been happier. No more parents; no more worries, right? Everything has changed now that I’m on my own: more freedom, more excitement… more girls. Of course, not everything is wonderful all the time.

LINDSAY

(offstage.)

Alex?

ALEX

You know the saying with more freedom comes more responsibility? Yeah, responsibility sucks. But that doesn’t stop me from having fun every now and then.

LINDSAY

Where’d my shirt go?

ALEX

Work all day sleep all night, if you know what I mean. Mom isn’t here to freak out about it and Dad, well, I never really cared what he said anyway. What I’m saying is I’ve got life made. Yeah. Definitely happier.

(LINDSAY enters stage left.)

LINDSAY

(rubbing her hands on ALEX’s stomach, and then suddenly pauses)

Alex, what are these?

ALEX

(Ignores her talking and hurriedly puts his shirt on.)

Then again, sometimes this happens: a girl is just infatuated enough to ask me questions.

(Girls’ voices from offstage flood in asking questions one at a time,

progressively getting louder and faster along with the music, though

LINDSAY’s voice is more distinct.)

GIRL 1

Where are you from?

GIRL 2

Oh, do you have any siblings?

LINDSAY

Alex, what are these?

GIRL 3

Do you still talk to your parents?

LINDSAY

How did you get these?

GIRL 1

You don’t remember?

GIRL 2

Is that so?

GIRL 3

Have you been lying to me?

(There is a pause.)

LINDSAY

Alex?

ALEX

And that’s about the time that I get rid of her. I mean, not in a morbid sense or anything, but I don’t answer phone calls, don’t initiate conversation, don’t make direct eye contact. The way I see it, there are plenty other fish in the sea, specifically ones who won’t care about “our” future… or my past.

(Spotlight fades to black.)

Scene II

Lights fade up on center to reveal MOM and DAD sitting in the living room scene as the spotlight comes on to ALEX. MOM occasionally gets up and walks in and out of the white door, bringing in a newspaper, or coffee, or whatever else DAD might ask of her. These actions continue in silence as ALEX speaks. LINDSAY is now slightly behind him and cannot hear him talking.

ALEX

When I was a kid, life wasn’t that great. my mom was strict as anything because as soon as something went wrong my dad would make her life a living hell.

(He gestures to his parents as the spotlight fades and the lights focus on

the scene on stage.)

MOM

Darling, the coffee is a bit hot, so be careful, alright?

DAD

I’ll be careful when I want to be careful.

(He sips the coffee.)

This is disgusting. Go make me another.

MOM

But, I made it just the way you like it: one crème, two sugars, and a dash of vanilla. I haven’t changed the way I’ve made it in years.

DAD

Are you talking back to me?

MOM

I- I..

(DAD drops the coffee mug on the ground. MOM flinches at the hot

liquid splashing on her, DAD grabs her aggressively and she becomes

silent. The lights dim on stage and ALEX’s spotlight returns.)

ALEX

That’s just the way he treated her when she messed up his coffee. You can only imagine how much worse it got. He would hit her and yell at her and every night I heard my dead dead dead mom’s whimpering because of his unwanted advances… That’s a thing you know, marital rape… Every morning without fail, she would be up before either of us, making us breakfast in bed with the biggest smile on her face and the biggest bruises on her arms, acting like they didn’t exist, like everything was fine. I would tell her that he was scum, that she didn’t deserve to be treated like that, that she should leave with me when I turned eighteen, that she was a coward for staying. One day, I guess she finally listened.

(The spotlight fades again as the lights on stage come up

MOM is sitting on the sofa, knitting. DAD enters through the

red door holding a piece of paper in his hand)

DAD

What the hell is this? You little whore, you think you can just tell me you're leaving? I bet it’s another guy isn’t it? You’ve been cheating on me!

MOM

No.

DAD

You have some nerve to sit there like that. Look me in the eyes and tell me what this is all about?

MOM

I’m leaving you. I haven’t cheated, I haven’t done anything wrong. It’s been you. This whole time… And I’ve known it, I just never wanted it to be true. But, now I’m leaving and there’s nothing more to be said or done.

DAD

How dare you, you little slut!

(DAD begins to attack MOM just as ALEX walks in through the white

door. ALEX fights DAD off MOM. DAD grabs one of the knitting

needles, but ALEX is oblivious, still fighting blindly. DAD pins ALEX

down on the couch with his back to the audience and lifts up the knitting

needle, stabbing ALEX in the abdomen multiple times until he no longer

struggles against his hold. MOM weeps at the edge of the couch. DAD

drops the needle and looks around in a panic then exits through the red

door. The lights fade.)

Scene III

LINDSAY and ALEX are back on stage as they were before when the spotlight comes back on.

ALEX

I went to the hospital that day; my mom took me. I was in the ICU for a while. I probably stayed for a good three days before being released. And the worst part is that she went right back to him, begging for forgiveness. I guess some things never change… some things can’t. But when I think about it, as much as I hate her for going back to him after what I did, I remind myself, if it wasn’t for me, it would have been her. It’s better me than her.

LINDSAY

(rubbing his chest)

Are these scars?

ALEX

Don’t worry ‘bout it.

LINDSAY

I can worry if I want.

ALEX

Look, I like what we’ve got here, I don’t wanna screw it up.

LINDSAY

I’m not asking for a ring.

ALEX

You’ve never mentioned them before.

(Beat.)

I don’t mean to-

LINDSAY

It’s fine, baby.

(They sit in silence for a few seconds.)

ALEX

(To the audience)

It's been five years since the incident back home. She wasn't the first girl to ask about my scars and how I got them. Every other time, I would say it was a sports accident or that they were from a procedure I had when I was young. Most of the girls were dumb enough to believe me. But I couldn't bring myself to tell her that I tripped while hiking with my family.

(To LINDSAY)

Actually, no. I said I don't want to screw this up. I don't. You deserve to know things about me.

( ALEX continues to talk, but fades to silence as the lights fade to black. Curtains close)


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User avatar
122 Reviews


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Sun Mar 30, 2014 3:39 pm
Purple wrote a review...



Hey there! Purple here to give you a review! HAPPY REVIEW DAY!!! Let's get started.
I'll first talk about the main idea of this script including my good and bad points. I think you showed an abusive relationship between a couple pretty decently, but what about the child? I'm not going to push my personal experiences with this here, but I just know that when someone is aggressive like that it's toward the both of them and not just the mother. If Alex wasn't in the story I wouldn't have a complaint about this but you said Alex was in his late teens or early 20s right? That means he would have gone through his teenage years and you know what that means! Stubbornness, opinionated, irresponsibility (not all teenagers are like this but it's common for a parent to interpret their actions as such) and how would his father react to this? I agree with BlueAfrica in that it would be interesting to show interactions between him and his father and since Alex has a good relationship with his mother she might defend him at some point.
Alex talks to audience 90% of the time which cuts out a lot if interaction between any of the other characters. He's just a narrator in most of this, which makes it seem like while giving his background you're giving the introduction to something. In other words, this doesn't go anywhere. What happens with him and Lindsay later? How does she react to him telling her those secrets? He seems young so what about college? A job? Paying the rent? Does his dad ever visit him? There was a climax with him getting abused but not a heavy one. It all seemed to be leading up to something and I was honestly left disappointed. I think if you kept going and made this a full production that would be amazing.
I hope this was helpful and have a happy review day!




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Sun Mar 30, 2014 12:57 pm
BluesClues wrote a review...



That took kind of a nice turn that I didn't expect. Actually, before we found out about the dad's abusiveness and we didn't really know about the scars, I expected that it would turn out that Alex was cheating on Lindsay or something, so I really like that he decides to let her in at the end.

I also think you did a good job with showing an abusive relationship, in that his mom is constantly eager to please and in denial about the fact that her husband is just a piece of crap. She gets abused over even stupid things like his coffee being disgusting (despite the fact that she's always made it just the same), apologizes for things that aren't her fault, and takes forever to even think about leaving him despite the fact that, to an outsider, it's obvious that she should. And although it's sad that she comes back to him in the end, that's also realistic. Even abuse victims who end up at domestic violence shelters sometimes try to go out and secretly meet their abusers, which is why shelters have such strict rules about who can come to the house and things like that.

The only thing I think isn't quite as realistic as the rest is, didn't the dad ever try to abuse Alex? I could see the mom trying to protect Alex or put herself in the way so his dad wouldn't hurt him, but from what we've got here it looks as if the dad never tried to do anything at all to Alex until the incident with the knitting needles, when it seems more like the dad was mad because Alex kept him from getting to the mom.

Also I think that detail about his mom getting strict--he says she's strict, but we don't really see it in the flashback. And again, because the dad never even really acknowledges Alex, it seems like she would be more concerned with her own actions than being strict with Alex.

So I'd just go back and show more of the dad's interaction with Alex--Alex screwing something up and dad trying either to hurt mom or to hurt Alex but then mom steps up and takes the blame so her boy doesn't get hurt.

Blue




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35 Reviews


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Sun Mar 30, 2014 4:42 am



omg this was amazing
I really enjoyed it
If it were a play I would go and see it
You kept me interested the ENTIRE time
And I'm sure there are some who can relate
Keep writing stories and plays
But this story is amazing
And I would recommend it to a friend
Great Job




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Mon Mar 24, 2014 8:24 pm
CuriosityCat says...



Wow! This is amazing! It's beautiful, in a sad way. I love it! (And, honestly, it's so cool I can't bring myself to review.) Also, how you repeat the "dead dead" parents kind of makes it scary. This is an awesome play!!
Keep calm and write on,
CuriosityCat : )




Lucky_Duck says...


Thanks! Actually, those "dead"s aren't supposed to be there. I was working on my little brother's computer and he has this program that puts the word dead after the word my so when he reads articles it says things like "My dead dog saved my life" when it's supposed to say "My dog saved my life". I guess I edited it a few times on there so it started repeating it! I've fixed it though, thanks to you.




Memories, left untranslated, can be disowned; memories untranslatable can become someone else’s story.
— YiYun Li