Chapter 1

Foreword

This is my first ever attempt at this kind of genre (romance), so please be nice! Just so you understand before you start reading, this a a romance between two men, so if you are uncomfortable with that I'm sorry! I hope you enjoy reading this chapter, and I will get to work on future ones. I'm open to any constructive advice, after all I'd never improve If I didn't get any. But without further a due, enjoy!

When The Clock Struck Twelve

It was a cold winter afternoon in Manhattan, and a thin layer of snow had blanketed the grounds of Battery Park. I found a small bench which I was able to snuggle up on and watch the various families build snowmen and have snowball fights, one of which ended up with a small child in tears. I used to love the snow, it always made the landscape so beautiful and calm, even if you were in the city itself, however now it just reminds me of the long nights I have to endure in the alleyways, with only my clothes and blanket to provide me with warmth. I must have fallen asleep, because when I awoke the sun was just beginning to disappear on the horizon, and as I turned over I saw a policeman walking toward me. He stopped next to the bench and gave me a concerned look, 

‘Evening Sir, I’m sorry but you will have to move, we can’t allow you to stay here,’ I looked back at him, nodded and began to pack my things into a small rucksack, one I got three years ago for my seventeenth birthday.
‘I understand officer, just let me pack up my things and I’ll be on my way, sorry to be a nuisance, you know how it is at the moment,’
‘I’ve seen you enough to know you mean no harm, heck you don’t even beg like lots of them do. If there was a way to let you stay here I’d let you, but it’s the law,’
‘I know, you’re just doing your job. I’ll be on my way, looks like a cold one tonight,’
‘It does, please be careful Sir; I wouldn’t want you to have any trouble at this time of year. It’s a joyful time, and if I find you again I will be sure to bring you some more blankets and food, as a Christmas gift,’ I looked at him, trying very badly to force a grin.
‘You don’t have to officer, but I won’t refuse!'

The police officer laughed, and let me get on my way. I’d met this one particular officer before on a few occasions, and he’d frequently helped me get food and blankets to survive the long cold nights in the city. He’d sometimes asked me why I didn’t go to a homeless shelter, and to be honest I didn’t know exactly why, I suppose I didn’t want to hand my problems over to other people, after all it wasn’t their fault I ended up like this. The sun had sunk beneath the horizon completely by the time I made it to a decent alley, because believe it or not I have my standards; when it comes to alleyways I prefer to be alone, so I get to sleep and also not have to beg to passers-by for ear plugs, and at the same time I don’t want too much rubbish because of the smell. There was one alley just over a mile away from the park that suited my criteria, which I went to, and by nightfall I had settled down as best as I could and I tucked into an apple I’d saved from lunchtime, not the most staple meal, but it was a damn sight better than what other people in the same situation ate.

The night pressed on, and I was eventually forced to stay awake, for if I fell asleep I feared I’d never wake up again. In the distance I could see the Empire State Building, where I’d once dreamed of working a simple office job. It would’ve paid the bills, put food on the table, and such a salary would also allow me to buy a small, warm apartment overlooking the city. It wouldn’t be much, but at least it would be mine, and I’d have the money to prove it. All those ideals were just distant dreams to me now, and all I had to look forward to was the next meal and the eventual sunrise, signifying yet another day of survival. After some time of slipping between waking and dreaming worlds, I stooped up and wandered out to look at the nearby clock; it was only midnight, so it was going to get colder, and knowing I was already cold enough to induce hypothermia and frostbite made me think about my life, in general. I was only twenty, and I was alone and on the streets, no one cared about me, no one knew me, and worst of all, I had no hope of a future.

I was now on my knees in the alley, on the verge of crying, and giving up on life, it had never been easy but I never thought it would be like this! From the age of sixteen, you see, I’d faced the trails of being gay in a high school, which sent me down the social hierarchy and essentially cast me aside much like I am now. I’d never had a lover, and I’d only been hated by my peers, and now I could only assume the rest of the world would be the same hateful environment, however I forced my mind back to my current situation, and I began to fill with an infernal rage, a blistering fury and immense hatred for everyone and everything. This rage filled up inside of me, until I burst out into a fit of yelling;

‘God, of whoever is up in the sky watching over me, I don’t care who! I don’t know what I did to deserve this! There are murderers out there and you choose to make me suffer? Why?! I worked hard my entire life, I helped everyone I could, I forgave those who hurt me, yet I still end up without a single dollar to my name. I don’t know what else to do, what is the point of continuing to live if I only suffer?’ I began to cry, and not just a few tears ‘faking it’ kind of cry, it was an uncontrollable wail, which rendered me unable to shout anymore; it was true, I had no purpose, I had nothing left to live for. I looked inside my rucksack a found a blunt knife, and held it towards where my heart was,

‘I have nothing, and I only suffer. It would be better if I was out of the way,’ I pushed the knife away from me and prepared to pull it in, to deliver the final blow and end it all, and I would have if another hand hadn’t grabbed the knife too. I looked up to see a shocked face, with tears running down it and a panicked pair of eyes. He was well built by the looks of it, and from what I could see he was handsome as well; his crystalline blue eyes brought out his short brown hair and well groomed stubble, and he was wearing a suit as well, which was strange attire for an alleyway.
‘What the hell are you doing?! I heard what you said and it’s not true, none of it! You have people who care about you, and you have a reason to live,’
‘Well if you know anyone who cares about ME then tell me! I don’t even know you, why are you saving me? Just let me die!’
‘I won’t let you die, not now, not ever. I care about you, you're family cared about you! How can you not recognise me?’ I looked at him again, and I remembered who he was. He was once the quarterback of our school football team, and one of the most likeable people in his whole class. He’d always been a suave talker, and was able to flirt with almost any girl; all in all he was pretty much a perfect man.
‘James? It’s really you? Why are you here saving me when you could be marrying the next top model?’
‘I don’t want a model, I don’t want a girl! Don’t you get it? I heard about you being on the streets so I came and found you, I couldn’t let you live like this, it’s not fair. You were always a really nice, attractive guy, and I have only wanted to be there for you since high school, and that was years ago!’
‘Wait, wait a second… You were gay too? How come I never heard about this?’
‘I never told anyone, I was afraid that people would hate me for it, and when I saw the way they treated you after you came out I was scared to do so as well. I wish I could have helped you, but I was afraid,’ I was having mixed emotions by this point, as I was feeling some resentment towards him for not helping me when I was most vulnerable, but at the same time I felt some happiness that he cared for me; I’d never known any happiness like it, and I allowed my hand to relax and let go of the knife, then James relaxed as well, and sat down beside me.
‘So, can I ask you your name? I never actually found that out,’ He was smiling at me now, looking into my eyes with a tenderness I was not accustomed to, but I welcomed it and returned the smile with a wry grin.

‘Zack, my name’s Zack,’
‘Well nice to meet you Zack, how about you pack up your things and come over to my place? I’ve got a spare room you can use for now,’
‘I’m not sure. You don’t have to, really,’
‘I’d take it as a personal insult if you didn't! I've already admitted that I love you, so why not come over and get back to health. Tomorrow I can help you get back to looking like the high school hottie I remember you as!’ I was now grinning from ear to ear as James helped me up and took my rucksack, he'd just flirted with me! I was inclined to ask him if he liked me in that way, but I avoided it for the time being, after all there were more important matters at hand. We walked out of the alleyway and into the main street, where he’d parked a yellow and black striped Camaro, reminiscent of the Transformers films I used to watch when I was younger. I couldn't quite believe what was happening, it was only a moment ago that my life had hit rock bottom, and I was about to end it all. But now I’m instead sat with someone who cares, on my way to a new chapter in my life, and for the first time, I felt like I actually had a purpose.