Tintinnabulation

And I'm back once more to the poetry archives and to explore someone's poor soul. I've reviewed quite a bit of your works and if you ever come back, hopefully you'll see that I managed to review all of them. I know that you have a very specific style. It has been improving as I go on and on with your progress, but you seem to be a fan of direct and explicit details. This is interesting but something you left out was a rating and a trigger warning, which seem to be needed for this.

The mentions of blood.
- need a trigger warning

I search my skin for papercuts
but I suppose two nights ago
did not affect me as much as I had thought.
Yet cutting passionfruit for breakfast
slipped a false line of dripping red across my
finger that was too bright and candied to be blood.

So in my mind, I'm counting this as representing two things. You have the mention of blood, when it's really fruit juice (but I want a warning all the same), rolling down someone's hand. And then the search for "papercuts" only leads my mind to thinking about self harm, which would match with some of the other material presented in the poem. Especially with the time line that is casually tossed out. Or maybe it really is about a series of papercuts from the love letters mentioned before.

The tattoo of thirst which taps on the lime and lemon
grass calls in my head and my tongue moves
longingly in my mouth.
The redolent sky is lined with the memories of time.
The percentage I recognise is unable to be seen
from this distance, and this day is only a jejune secret.

All of your imagery seems overdone and sexual in some way, which is why I stopped reviewing your poems for awhile. I don't like the sound that comes from the writing. It's almost like as a writer, you're talking down to the readers who are trying to find the message in your work. That's what I always try and tell young writers on this website when they keep piling the layers on.
You have to find the right sound, while keeping the function.

Today the green light sweetens
with a sugary glow, sifting through kiwifruit leaves
and summer shadows that sway on the road.

So the constant switching between times becomes a bit much but then I saw Chevy's comment about this being a diary entry. And while I hadn't really thought of that perspective when reading these details, that would be a structure that would fit to this cause. I assumed that part of the detail in this was being a dramatic person. With some effort towards bringing themselves to life in this particular way to be seen by the world.

Yes it's a bit much.
Yes, it makes it hard to make sense of the purpose.
But yes, if it were a poetry form of a diary entry, that would make more sense for the bearing your soul aspect. Once I went back to the beginning, I saw about the narrator revealing more on their true self.

So I did enjoy this more than I did your previous works, but I still have a lot of the same complaints. There's too many different imagery points being shoved into the same small space, meaning that the reader is overwhelmed. (and that's not really the feeling you want them to have) I think you just need to comb through this and prioritize what you really love. And then what you can cut down on.

Have a nice day.
- Lizz