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Is This What You Call Childhood?

by Liberty

They have a sick mother, who cares about nothing but herself. They have a busy father, who cares about nothing but his work. They have parents who don't care at all for them.

You think that's what you call childhood? No.

The kids will grow up, to have families of their own. What will they have to tell their children? Nothing. Because they never had a childhood. What will they teach their children? Nothing. Because their parents didn't teach them anything.

Try to understand the fact that you have parents. Try to be grateful for your family. I know you can have some up sides and down sides. Well, I do too. And so do these children!

They have a sick mother, but she does everything to give her children attention. She cooks, she feeds, she cleans. They have a father, who very busy with work, but no matter what, he always gives his children the best quality time. Their parents love them with all their hearts.

You think that's what you call childhood? Yes.

What will the children tell their children when they grow up and have beautiful families of their own? "We have wonderful parents, who took care of us and gave us a home."

Childhood is when your parents take care of you, love you, feed you, earn for you, sacrifice anything for you. 

Your mother gave birth to you. Be grateful. Your father educated you. Be grateful. Return their love by helping your parents when they grow weary and old. When they're too sick to do things themselves. Be grateful that your parents still have kept you inside your house. And, that they haven't tossed you away like you think they should. Some people think that. I know people who think like this. If you think like this, don't. It's wrong.

Well, anyways, going back to the topic. Tell me, what do you call childhood? Do you call it having fun and going outside all the time and nothing more? Or do you call it having quality time with your family? Or something else? 

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562 Reviews

Points: 14535
Reviews: 562

Thu May 02, 2019 9:53 am
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FlamingPhoenix wrote a review...

Hello, FlamingPhoenix here with a short review for you on this lovely day. I will also help get this out the green room.

Let's start.

First off, I think @Toboldlygo Pointed out everything that need to be fixed. I do agree that this line was a little confusing.

They have a sick mother, who cares about nothing but herself.

I do a greet this could be worded a little better. Because when I read this I thought she was sick like ill type of sick. But like @Toboldlygo said I could also be read as a revolting type of sick. But if she was ill then I would have worded it like this.
They have an ill mother, who cares about nothing but herself.

But other than that I really liked this work, It could teach you a lot about what your mother and father has to go through to bring you up. I know some kids hate there mother and father because they don't spend enough time with them. And I think it is part of growing up, there for your childhood.
So I think everyone having trouble with their mother and father should read this. It's a really good way to explain things to them. So great job.

Well that's all from me for now. I really liked reading and reviewing this for you Liberty. I do hope you will keep writing and post more on YWS soon. Never stop writing and have a great day or night.

Your friend
Reviewing with a fiery passion.

Liberty says...

Thanks for the review! Now I'm definitely going to try to fix that first line. XD

I'm glad I could help you out, I really liked reading this work.

Liberty says...

:D Thanks.

No problem!

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155 Reviews

Points: 11208
Reviews: 155

Wed May 01, 2019 8:27 pm
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Toboldlygo wrote a review...

Hey there! Toboldlygo here for a review.

First of all, I do like the morals you put into it. We absolutely should be thinking about good parenting and remembering that no matter what, there's always room for love!

The first line is, I think, a little vague. "They have a sick mother, who cares about nothing but herself." I think it can either imply physically sick, as in a chronic illness, or a mother who is sick meaning disgusting and doesn't care about her kids. The way it's written, it implies the latter, but later it seems as if you mean physically sick. While I do like your point about taking care of your kids no matter what circumstances you have in life, I also question if you're portraying people with chronic illnesses in a fair light. Your examples of a good sick mother is one who cooks, cleans, and feeds. What if you instead focused on a mother who loves, nurtures, and is attentive to their needs? If she has physical difficulties doing the housework, it can make someone feel bad that that's how people judge if a mother is good. It also implies that making kids do chores is bad parenting, and I would have to disagree on that point. Not doing chores or cook or anything is why kids grow up and go to college and live off microwave ramen, pizza, and spaghetti. But I digress. I personally feel that a loving mother is more important than one who does all the labor in the house, and I think it would nice to see acknowledgement that cooking and cleaning aren't the only, or even best, ways for a mom to take care of her kids.

And finally, in this line here, "They have a father, who very busy with work, but no matter what, he always gives his children the best quality time," there is a tense switch. The sentence is in present tense but the busy dad is in the past tense, so it doesn't make sense to read.

Overall, I think it's a great piece and really geared towards making people think. Well done!

Happy Writing!


Liberty says...

Thanks for the review! I'll def look at all the stuff you pointed out. :)

A person is a fool to become a writer. His only compensation is absolute freedom. He has no master except his own soul, and that, I am sure, is why he does it.
— Roald Dahl