Before the story starts I'd like to warn this story can trigger some. It references self-harm and severe depression.
I feel the sweet tingle of weightlessness flow throughout my body; my head, chest, and wrists are all euphoric with the blissful numbness that comes, yet I can still hear the phone ring. I thought you were blocked
“Hello?”
I say cautiously, still remembering our last conversation
“Why baby”
I hear her voice again, the same voice that made me feel the happiest and lightest I ever have.
“Things got heavy again, I’m sorry darling I- I couldn’t stop”
The uncontrollable downpour prevailed, and tears started running down my chin.
“Did you know I tried texting you, but it never sent.”
I tried to say as if it didn’t destroy me.
“Yeah silly, you know we don’t talk anymore”
“But we’re talking right now”
“No, we aren’t”
“What? I need you right now.”
“It’s too late my love, I’m gone and I can’t help anymore”
“You’re not gone, I still see you in the halls.”
“But do I ever see you back?”
“No”
There was an awkward silence filled only with the sounds of rain on my dirty window. I looked around my dark and messy room, remembering how clean it was when she was here, and how beautiful her eyes looked in the natural light that peered through my window.
“You need some fresh air hun, you’ve been cramped in your room for too long”
She wasn’t wrong, I’ve been rotting away here all day. I got up and walked outside. The chilly air hit my lips as I stepped outside and red leaves littered the yard.
“Remember the pink flowers I’d grab you during spring.”
“Those were my favorite, I saved them all”
“I wish you were here with me”
“I’m not even here right now”
“What are you talking about ”
“It’s 4 am, I’m asleep, you know I hate staying up late.”
“But you're talking to me right now”
“No I’m not, we haven’t talked in months”
“How’d you know I haven’t left my room in days?”
There was a momentary silence
“What's the last thing you remember?
” she said avoiding my question
“I can’t remember… I felt the weight come off.”
“Try to remember love.”
“I- I tried to text you”
“And what happened?”
“It didn't send..”
“How’d you feel?”
“Alone”
“What happened next?”
“I grabbed the blade..”
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