Published December 18, 2009
Please… an interesting word. It’s like begging, but not quite. It’s soft, and meek. It’s a request. It lets people know that you want something. Well, you won’t find me using it. Not now, at least. Now there are no people. Now that I’m alone. I wish… I could have done something more. I should have stabbed when I had the chance. I shouldn’t have hesitated at killing a man. But I did. I did, and now the one I care about is dead. I should have given him the right attention when he was wounded; I should have put him in a bed, bandaged him up, told him to get better and cared for him. But I didn’t. And now he’s dead. I should have – no. Worrying about the ‘should haves’ and ‘ifs’ is like saying please. It’s asking the fates to right a wrong. It’s like asking the gods to bring him back. It’s like begging. And I won’t beg. I won’t mourn. I will cry. But I won’t say please.
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139,568 Literary Works • 672,610 Reviews
Wow. This is a really pretty, and interesting idea. It's really good. I really liked it. The theory is really interesting. It makes me want to read more. It's makes me want to wonder, and imagine.
This is really nice.
Good job. Keep writing!
~Mo.
I love this beginning. It makes the setting seem very dark and cold; you have this cold figure who will swear that he won't ever beg and plead, because of his, dare I say, morals.
Amazing, that's all I can say.
i like it! so true But i was and still am a little confused on a line.
"Not now there are no people" double negative? maybe add a comma or change it? when i read it, that phrase just stuck out a little from the rest. The peice is just so unspecific it almost lets the reader think up there own story, just with a little guidelines, and that is a good thing. It isn't something i see a lot and i am always glad to see someone write like this :]
That is what it sounds like though. a beginning... to something great. keep writing
I really liked this line. In a way it summarized the entire piece, and can make the reader's train of though click and pause in a moment of realization that it's true.
I'm not too sure what this all is about, and in way that is good for a short little writing. It gives all of us--the reader and the author--a little bit to think about. To form and mold a story around this.
Even if it is rather small, I can picture this as a great opening for anything from a play, a nonlinear story, a speech... Keep it up, I like your style(;