Young Writers Society

Home » Literary works » Poetry » Fantasy

E - Everyone

Deaths' Truth and Life's Lie

by Kat2003


I have set your lie free

It is now free as a mourning dove,

Free as the lives I’ve taken

-

You were probably waiting

To free your lie

When I set my truth straight

-

But just like the spreading

Of a dove’s wings

I opened your lie to the world


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
64 Reviews


Points: 733
Reviews: 64

Donate
Sun Jan 27, 2019 9:16 pm
Aliceinhorrorland wrote a review...



Hello! I’m here to review. Okay so first I think this poem flows extremely well, and I think it’s a really cool poem in general. Like others have stated, I think that this poem was rather short. I feel like if this were at least a bit longer, then this would be a truly exceptional poem. But at the same time, since it’s so short, it can leave your reader thinking about it long after it’s read. Regardless of length, I think this is a good poem. And I don’t think you’re going to change it because it was written a few years ago, but maybe you should try to rewrite it, with your interpretation now? I don’t know, you do whatever you want. I think you have a really strong poem here!


~CAKEEEEE~




Random avatar

Points: 24
Reviews: 11

Donate
Thu Jan 03, 2019 6:05 am
wetumbrella5 wrote a review...



Hi. You have written a great piece about freedom and I liked the contrast between life and death, lie and truth in your story.
But may I ask you why it was so short?
Did you have limits for the word count or maybe something else?

"Free as a mourning dove" is a good description by the way.

Keep writing!




User avatar
45 Reviews


Points: 0
Reviews: 45

Donate
Wed Jan 02, 2019 10:30 pm
potatoefry2001 wrote a review...



Hey there, Kat2003, 'Tato here for a review! First, I must say, you have a way with words. I am in tears. I love the line that says "But just like the spreading Of a dove's wings I opened your lie to the world." This poem of yours is simple, yet extravagant. All I have to say is it usually takes a lot to touch me emotionally, and you have done it. I must ask, if you are okay with answering me, what was your inspiration for this piece? And, what was the piece for, like what class? Did you have any restrictions? Anyways, feel free to either answer me on here, or you can PM me anytime. I would love to hear from you! Also, if you want, I would love to hear your thoughts on my writings, and maybe have you critique it. I would love to get a second opinion to something I am working on right now if you want, too. Anyways, long story short, you did a really good job! Keep up the great work! Happy Writings! 'Tato Out. :D :D :D





Love is not an emotion. Love is a promise.
— 12th Doctor