The cold dark water
So deep and quiet
Washing along the shore
Moving but not changing
The blinding hands of faith
Cling to me, try to hold me back
As I step through the sand
Towards the waters edge
The darkness hides all
The faith in another life
Empty here, I’m so alone
Moving but never changing
I slowly slide towards the end
The god I loved has gone
And while I submerge into the water
A single question I cry.
I twist and turn beneath the ocean
And stare into the light above
The dark hands of faith wrap around
As I ask “Do you love?”
The god I loved deserted me
But I’m still meant to believe
In the cold and desolate ocean
I scream “Do you love?”
The hands drag me down to the bottom
And choke me, strangle me
The blackness swallows all
And I mouth “Do you love?”
The movement in the black
So sharp, so pure behind the veil
A single voice, a voice that powers all
As I’m asked “Do you love?”
just a little something i wrote after feeling quite dark.
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I couldn't help but think when reading this that this gave no meaning or added nothing to the poem. I think it would have conveyed the same image if it were left out. I also thought that it was pretty interesting how you described faith as holding you back. Pretty cool, though I thought this was more about suicide than anything else.
Hi
I just wanted to let you know that you need to do two reviews before posting anything of your own on here. That way everyone gets a little feedback.
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