Published September 11, 2011
To all those people,
who were in the air,
and saved our Capital,
But didn't make it.
To all those people,
who were working hard,
and making sure our nation runs smoothly.
But didn't make it.
To all those people,
who saw the plane,
and did what others wouldn't think to do,
who acted as a leader,
acted as a friend,
acted as a hero.
But didn't make it.
To all those people,
who saved so many other lives in the past,
who has time and time again looked into the flames, and charged in.
But didn't make it.
To all those people,
who had to leave their colleagues behind,
who had to run.
But, made it.
To all those people,
who were burned,
bruised,
deafened,
traumatized,
and forever wounded internally.
But, made it.
To all those people,
who had to watch,
watch the glass,
watch the fire,
watch the steel,
watch it all shudder, tremble,
and collapse.
But, made it.
And to all those people.
Those who made it.
And those who didn't.
We shall never, ever forget.
That one morning.
Those two hits.
On September 11,
2001
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140,121 Literary Works • 673,028 Reviews
Wow, strong poetry. I liked the repetition, for those who didn't and did make it. I loved the ending when you stated it for all those people who didn't or did make it too. It was nice how you put the date at the end.
This poem is so hard to review because I have a lot of thoughts rubbing through my mind. You put in so many different aspects of what different people may of had to go through in order to survive or not. I find it really skillful if your good at doing that. It has a main root on what this poem is about but you look at all the different sections as well.
There is one thing about this poem that I would change though. It needs to be broken up into verse. It would be a whole load easier for your reader to read I think. There are obvious places where the verses should be, at the end of every people who did/didn't make it. I wouldn't paste in the whole poem and mark them out for you.
Overall, I really like that poem and as the first commenter said, it 'really hit home'. I don't usually read sad pieces of writing, (well really sad that happened) because it makes me cry, and your poem brought me near to tears and throughly moved me.
Deanie x
This is an emotional topic, and you summed it up well. I like the way that you included both the heroes and victims who died and those who survived. I found the last few lines a little bit confusing. I think you just started the sentence wrong or something. You might want to look that over. Also, if you want to add even more feeling, maybe describe the experiences of the victims more. When you say they were traumatized, give examples. Nightmares, anxiety, hearing screams, that kind of thing. Figurative language could also help, too. Anyway, thank you for writing about this; it's a sensative but important topic. I hope my review helps. Keep writing.
This poem was amazing. I loved every line, the sense of that day came back to me, and i got to see a glimpse of a heors perspective, who acted on that day to help others, while reading you poem. Beautiful!
I loved this, and I think you did a great job. It was simple and to the point and hit home. You did a great job, keep up the good work.
5 owls out of 5
~Owl