Being a werewolf isn’t easy especially being a female, living between two different lives that isn’t normal for a regular teenager. Being a straight A honor roll student to being a secret life of a werewolf. Having the bloodlines of alpha and beta of the strongest and the most powerful pack of the whole country is going to be tough and ever complicated. But when your brother and your best friend’s brother is the new alpha and beta is going to be very different, and being next in line now that’s going to be tough more than ever. The two girls of them will be the first two female top leader’s of the pack which is never ever had been in the history of the whole nations of packs. They must train and learn how to protect the pack from hunter’s who want to take care of them and every single pack of the whole country for good. Soon one of the girl’s finds of herself falling in love with the leader of the hunter’s son.
© J.marie Freiberg 2012
All Rights Reserved
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Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
Anyway let's get right to it,
Soo...this appears to be some sort of summary of the story, or I think rather this works best as some sort of blurb here with the sort of story that you've got going on at the moment. And I'd say, as far as those go, this one is one of the more interesting ones that I have managed to run into.
Going into a bit more detail, I can see that there's a decent amount of worldbuilding judging by the whole complex werewolf hierarchy situation and the hunters. It seems like a decent amount of work has gone into the world here and that's always quite fun to see.
It also looks like the characters here are going to face quite the list of challenges there, with lots of potential for some pretty emotional moments there, so the premise overall looks pretty solid here. A story where it appears the character is going to have to learn how to be a leader and then deal with what appears to be feelings towards the enemy for the group she leads certain seem like some pretty powerful plot points there.
Overall, it seems like we've got ourselves a pretty interesting story right here...and its certainly one that I'd read at any rate.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
I love love love werewolf stories, and I love how you posted this brief description, I can't wait to see what follows it, but that being said I do have some questions. Is the story about a girl or two different girls, and I was confused on the alpha/ beta aspect. Is one girl from alpha linage while the other beta? And if the brother is the Alpha how can she be the top? I think maybe a rewrite on this to clear it up and specify exactly what you're trying to say, it gets a little confusing. However I will continue to read, and see what happens. Keep writing!
Hey there!

This is pretty neat, I am guessing that this is a prolog or maybe a summary of the novel you are going to write. If it is, you did well in the placement of words and drawing the person into wanting to read this. Great job! I do have a few questions I'd like to ask... Please don't take them the wrong way, I don't mean to be rude.
1. What are the names of the packs? Instead of just saying "pack" use the name of the different pack's so we can see which ones you are talking about.
2. Do the Hunter's have an organization name? If so, that's what you should use instead of using just the word hunter. Now unless that's the name, which you can do that, you did well!
Those are actually the only two things I had about this. This seems like a novel that I would love to read and I will be keeping updates on weather you put up the first chapter or so! Thanks for you time,
~Whitewolfpuppy