The Smoker's Sea Song

by JiRuiHe

Published August 15, 2009

Want to watch the planes in the sky
Eternally.
Want to meet you at the bridge,
Only after three, when I feel lonely.

Walk away from what we know.
Take me where I want to go.
Let’s pretend the world is dark –
Its inhabitants cruel and landscape stark.

We can be friends tonight
If we blow our smoke to the sea.
Things never feel all right
So we seek sage in the sky’s astronomy.

Want to forget superstition and
Circumstance.
Left my watch in the past, along with my
Cognizance.

So let’s leave this place that we know,
And escape to where we want to go.
Can’t we pretend we share Night with the stars?
Let the salty air heal our scars?
Cause I never feel more abandoned than I do when I’m with you
No, I never feel lonelier than when I’m with you.

Still, I hope we can be friends tonight,
We’ll blow our smoke to the sea.
I know you never feel all right
So I seek sage in the sky’s astronomy.

Comments & reviews · 5
Random avatar
EpsonBelenus Comment
EpsonBelenus commented Comment · Feb 23, 2010

soft silhouetted pictures capture my head when i read these lyrics your song takes one on a simplistic journey yet all five of humanities senses on earth are vivid.

User avatar
ethanswish
Review
ethanswish wrote a review Review · Feb 18, 2010

Wawww, I like.
I love how you use real words, most of the lyrics you hear nowadays don't have words with over three syllables so that idiots don't get hemerages trying to figure out what they mean.
Your imagery is very strong, the first verse captivated me. I love the structure you've used, it makes the rhythm seem flowing, yet partly offbeat, keeping it interesting.
What's the main concept in the song? I've got a few ideas, and I can relate a few personal thoughts into some of the lyrics.
I think the lyrics would sound good in a soft rock song, but not a mainstream soft rock, maybe an underground or more grungey styled genre.

Random avatar
JiRuiHe
Comment
JiRuiHe commented Comment · Feb 17, 2010

I'm not very musical, but I always imagined some sort of folk/ soft rock sound to the song. Any suggestions? I would greatly appreciate critique!

User avatar
alohajuice
Comment
alohajuice commented Comment · Oct 10, 2009

That was nice. What sound are you planning for this?



People find it far easier to forgive others for being wrong than being right.
— Albus Dumbledore