Staring out the window
Waiting for the end
When does the bell ring
So you can go see your friends.
Playing on the quad
The ball bounces off the end
A football game on the oval
A round of duck duck goose.
The terraces the best viewing
For a fight, that happens
Now and then.
Its a spectacle here
You can see the mountains
Oh so blue.
Its where those three sisters dwell
According to the stories
They were once like you and me.
So now that class is over
I'm rushing through the door
Down the steps and through the gate
It is a journey here.
You wont miss it till it's gone.
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140,555 Literary Works • 673,430 Reviews
This poem is very true. Overall I liked it and completely agreed. There is one thing that I thought just didn't flow.
I think if you can fix that it would be better. I also think it was predictable but overall I really liked it. Keep writing!This poem speaks the true.
I think it's cliche because it's so true...from the first few lines, I could already see where it was going. Put in an element of surprise. Add in the unexpected. People like to comfoted and have something to relate to, but too much comfort borders on boredom. I agree - have a fire in it, or just something to make it leap out at you. Well done for choosing such a real and down-to-earth topic - now just raise it up a little so it shimmers in the air in front of us!
Cool Poem. Reminds me of how cool primary school was.
How very interesting. I have very little to add to the review.
This is lovely and very relatable to a lot of people I'm sure!
I think you could probably expand on this a lot.
I don't know if this has ever happened to you but, when I used to be in high school and another school had been on the news because it burnt down or something everyone used to wish it'd happened to their school? Maybe you could have that in your poem and then later the narrator grows up and his/her school really gets burnt down and it makes them sad. If you get what I mean.
Any questions or anything PM me
This poem explains a lot, and is very true. You did a great job.