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That One Day We were in Love

by JenTep

     It had been awhile since I was on a school campus, it brought back memories of long nights not doing homework and learning to cope with stress. I was delighted remembering I had graduated and was involved in the real world now. Not all of us were so fortunate, case in point, I was visiting my best friend and laying a trap. It was our friendship anniversary of meeting each other, it was her first year of college. It took some laps to find the right class room but there it was, a simple blue door in a brick wall along a wide stone path beside a long stretch of grass. Directly across the door was a sapling of a tree, taller than anyone on campus but its branches were slender and bare. The trap was never planned beyond the desire to lay it and it formed quickly.

     I undid my favorite necklace, the same one I had on when we had met and secured it to a branch that hung at eye level. A simple chain with a purple bell attached, it rung slightly in the wind but there wasn’t a threat of it falling. This bell was the whole reason we had met and it deserved a better home now. I hid among a group of students sitting the grass nearby, keeping an eye on the blue door and the purple bell. The group accepted my presence and we made small talk, they were freshman and excited about the future. I was excited to see her face.

     My phone lit up and I excused myself to answer her, I suppose she was excited too.

     “I just finished class, are you on your way to pick me up?” I could hear her struggling to multitask with one hand on the phone and the other fumbling with stuffing her backpack. She thought I was running late. I’m never late, I thought she would realize this by now but the look on her face every time told me it still caught her off guard.

     “Yeah, meet me by the tree outside your classroom? The one straight outside the door.” I could sense the confusion in her voice then I saw it when she skittered out of the classroom with a mob of other students. She found the tree and looked around, passing over the bell and turned away from me.

     “Okay, where are you?” She pouted and scanned the crowds in front of her. I snapped a photo of her beside the tree, oblivious to my presence.

     “Check your texts, I sent you a photo.” The caption to the photo read ‘Look at this idiot.’ She looked down at her phone and I was beside the bell now, I rang it with a grin. “I guess you don’t want this.”

     She was a deer caught in the headlights as it processed, her eyes darted from me to the bell as it disappeared in my pocket. She lunged and dropped her bag, spinning around me as I turned. Keeping her prize away from her, my face hurt from the smile.

     “I’m not an idiot, now give me!”

     I dangled the bell as high as I could, narrowly avoiding her grasp. A couple of onlookers stopped to watch, there’s always something going on these campuses.

      “Why should I give it to you?” I teased and hid it behind my back, stepping back to enjoy my work.

     “Because I’m in love with you!”

     The bell was in her possession without a fight, a silence between us. My face was flushed, not as much as hers though. She turned away, equipped the bell and fixed her hair before she faced me.

     “I’ve never said that to anyone before, besides my dad.” We try to laugh away the awkwardness and I straighten the bell around her neck. I rang it between my fingers, grounding me back to reality.

     “I’m in love with you too.”

     “Ready for lunch then?” She held my hand and powered through her typical shyness to where I told her I parked. I was floaty, I was filled with this glow that only her smile could make me feel and now it felt real. All throughout our lunch picnic, the venture into old book stores, and the final steps up to her front door, I cherished every minute.

     I unlocked it and waved her in, we hugged and I went home. That was it. Best friends forever, always in love. I couldn’t be happier though. Even as things stayed normal.

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58 Reviews

Points: 1519
Reviews: 58

Mon Apr 27, 2020 1:55 pm
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BhavyaMehta123 wrote a review...

Hey! First of all, Welcome to YWS. I hope you have a lovely time here. This was a short, sweet and cute little story. I liked it very much. All the emotions were on point. And, I must say it was a well- written story.
The best part about your story is that I could glide with it and could feel the emotions of both the characters.Also, the description of the setting, and the suspense and curiosity which was created was perfect. So, Great Job!
The last lines summed up everything which story as a whole wanted to tell.I feel you have written a beautiful story.
Lastly, all the best for your future works and Keep Writing!
From: Bhavya

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94 Reviews

Points: 3450
Reviews: 94

Mon Apr 27, 2020 4:43 am
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Gravitem wrote a review...

Hey! I'm Grav and I shall be reviewing your story today.

I really loved this story. Its adorable :)

I loved your characters. None of them seemed to be introduced in the matter of seconds or anything. I mean to say that it wasn't rushed. The story built itself smoothly and there were no points in the story where I felt like the transition between ideas was too abrupt or too slow. I mean to say that everything in your story was wll balanced.

There were no significant grammatical errors I noticed.

I think your story is really nice. I mean two best friends just pouring out their love for each other is just a great thing to write about because, it's a "feel good" kinda read and I love those? And I love this and I really want more of these :D

I really hope this was helpful and that the next time you write you'll have a wider smile on while publishing your stuff because you'll be sure that people love your story when they read it. Welcome to YWS! I hope you write more soon!


Yours sincerely,
Grav :D

JenTep says...

Thank you, thank you! I certainly enjoyed the encouragement! There tends to be a subtle bittersweet undertone in a lot of my writing, it's amazing how that can cause some people to feel more of the bitter or the sweet when they read it. Perhaps you'll like my other shorts on here, I might be able to get another one up tonight if I get the energy to review and write something.

You were incredibly helpful in that I'm more confident about what I'm doing! Hope you have many good reads in your future! Much appreciated!

Peace and blessings,

Gravitem says...


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25 Reviews

Points: 638
Reviews: 25

Mon Apr 27, 2020 3:44 am
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AngelLily wrote a review...

Hi! AngelLily with a review!

First, I just want to say, “Welcome to the community!” I hope that you are enjoying your time here. Okay, so I liked your story. Your characters seem realistic, so that’s good. Flow and structure are also great.

I noticed that you didn’t indent any of your stuff. Not really a big deal, but you might want to check it out. Your dialog was pretty good, though. Their flow of conversation was great.

Grammar mistakes— I didn’t see much of it. There was this sentence: “Ready for lunch than?”
It’s supposed to be “Ready for lunch then?”
“Than” is only used when comparing two things.

I liked your descriptions, it really created good images in my mind, and I was able to read through the story better. I like your style. You have great writing potential! Hope you have a great day or night, whatever.

Keep writing, and I am looking forward to reading more of your stories!
~AngelLily 😇

JenTep says...

Ah, the joys of writing on no sleep! I've taken up writing again at work where I do 12-14 hour shifts so excuse the silly "than" mishap! Thank you for the warm welcome, AngelLily! I've been enjoying myself, keeping busy for sure! I hope the winds are blowing you in a good direction!

I'm enthused you enjoyed the story and the intricacies in it, it encourages me to do more! It was a pleasure hearing from you! Mucho gracias!

Peace and blessings,

okay I think I need to grab some nachos
— BluesClues