Young Writers Society

Home » Literary works » Novel / Chapter » Fantasy

E - Everyone

The Cursed Generation - Chapter 1: Melody

by JdoggyGirl

Chapter 1


I am not a normal girl. If anything, I’m extraordinary. Well, at least according to my little sister, Nora. I wouldn’t call what I have extraordinary. Where I’m from is called Flippen. Middle of nowhere, Missouri. We are a strange little town, always cloudy and grey, not even seen on a map. Every couple generations, a freak generation is born. Andy, Nora, Phillip, and I are part of one. Each of us is different. You may think that's sweet, how we are unique or something, but it's not. Being different is never fun. You get classified as a freak. And it’s not fun. Especially the way I, Melody Brook Chesterfield, the 7th-grade freak is treated.


I slipped into the Burrygrate Junior High lunch room, speed walking to the small table in the back corner with my head angled downward, hoping one would notice me. Yep, the best seat in the house right here. Phillip beat me to it. Phillip is what most people call a humanoid, with the body of a thirteen-year-old boy, but the face of a fox. The only feature on his head that wasn’t fox-like was the tuft of blonde hair on his forehead. And like always, Phillip wore a long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants, no matter the day. To be fair, the weather’s always sweat-shirt weather here.

“Hey Phil,” I sighed as I plopped down across from him.

“Hi Melody,” Phillip muttered, his eyes downcast to his sandwich. I could tell Alyssa and her goons got to him. One of these days, I’m going to pull off this beanie and these sunglasses and turn her to stone. With that thought, my little snake friends fought excitedly against my beanie, but I pulled it down securely around my ears.

“Did they do something?” I asked, nodding to the kids at one of the middle tables, dressed like high-schoolers, laughing their heads off.

“For square dancing in the gym, I was paired up with Alyssa,” Philip said with disgust on his face.

“Oh,” I muttered. Alyssa was the queen bee of bullying me, Phil, and Andy. She hasn't stopped since she moved here in second grade. Most kids just ignored or avoided us, and once in a while they were nice to us. Not Alyssa. I tried to befriend her once, but instead, she shuddered and screeched “Ewwwww! Creeps! All of you! Get away from me! Fur Butt! Fang face! Slop monster!” The memory echoed in my head. My hand went instinctively to my mouth. I have only Alyssa to thank for being too scared to smile in school.

I glared over at Alyssa, watching how her sleek, shiny black hair reflected the large, harsh ceiling lights of the cafeteria. I wished I could do something to avenge Phillip’s bad gym period, but none of the teachers found any fault in her. If we tried to fight her, the lunchroom supervisors would stop us and put us in detention for attacking a “Poor defenseless child.” Most of the people here weren’t born in Flippen, and therefore don’t trust those of us with, shall we say, unusual tendencies.

“Heads up, slop monster!” Rider, Alyssa’s boyfriend, shouted through the lunch room. I looked up to find Andy, another of my friends, running up the middle aisle trying to reach our table. Rider threw a bag full of leftover sloppy-joe at him. I wished I could pull off my glasses and turn it to stone, but I would get in big trouble if I missed. Luckily, Riders throw went wide and hit some other kid in the head. The kid stood up, furious, and whacked Rider hard in the head with the bag. In the meantime, Andy bolted the rest of the way to the table.

“So… how's your day?” he sighed as he dropped down into the seat.

Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

Is this a review?



User avatar
6 Reviews

Points: 361
Reviews: 6

Sun May 09, 2021 5:40 pm
JdoggyGirl says...

Thanks for the positive feedback everyone! The idea is that only people born within the city limits during a certain generation get the "freak side." Most people in Flippen either weren't born their, weren't born in the generation, or specifically went on a vacation when they were expecting their baby so the kid wouldn't be unusual. I'm pretty sure that these four, Melody, Phillip, Andy, and Nora are the only ones with the freak side. Maybe there's a few that have less obvious freak sides or a few that are in high school or something. I haven't asked my friend. Some things get explained a little later, in the next chapter.

User avatar
382 Reviews

Points: 38308
Reviews: 382

Sun May 09, 2021 8:11 am
MailicedeNamedy wrote a review...

Hi JdoggyGirl,

Mailice here with a short review! :D

An exciting story rendered with a great narrative perspective. I think you have a very nice and calm writing style. I like how you get straight to the point with the introduction. The way Melody talks about herself is good and I also like the way she sometimes adds a comment to the narrative as the action progresses.
It's also great that you know a bit about the people Melody is with and that you get to know a bit of her everyday life.
You've written a good introduction with the first chapter, which gives the reader exactly the most important information.

I slipped into the Burrygrate Junior High lunch room, speed walking to the small table in the back corner with my head angled downward, hoping one would notice me.

I like the sentence because it made me wonder at the beginning, but by means of the paragraph sign from earlier, which is a snake, and the comments about her snake friends, I'm pretty confident that she's leaning towards Medusa. That makes the quoted sentence a lot more interesting and is a great foreshadowing on the not concrete suggestion of why she is a freak.

Phillip is what most people call a humanoid, with the body of a thirteen-year-old boy, but the face of a fox. The only feature on his head that wasn't fox-like was the tuft of blonde hair on his forehead. And like always, Phillip wore a long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants, no matter the day. To be fair, the weather's always sweat-shirt weather here.

I love how you describe Phillip from Melody's point of view here and I'm curious when the point will come how she wants to present herself. The short description of Alyssa is also good and I like the fact that Melody doesn't always remain neutral. The only criticism here is that Rider is not really described, where I think Melody would have a rather sarcastic or mean comment left for him.

I think that's the big plus point in the narrative. As I read in your comment, with each chapter someone else will take over the narrative role and I think that can be very interesting and exciting because I expect to know more about the other characters. The important thing then is that they all don't sound too similar.

It's a good first chapter that already gives an important insight into the characters. I am very curious to see how the story will develop and what the characters will experience.

Enjoy the writing!


User avatar

Points: 177
Reviews: 2

Sun May 09, 2021 2:01 am
Darkheart4life wrote a review...

I like the title The Cursed Generation i think its a good title/name because it kinda gives the reader a sense of confusion on whats going to happen but it also gives them an idea that like the generation is different then the other normal generations! I also honestly think that throughout the story you can add bits and pieces of like her back story/origin story. so like this is a fantasy book another suggestion is that you could make this like a prolog and write a chapter that is a flashback from like the beginning of the school year or from like when she moved there. also if you did like a profile for melody and the other characters and just have that off to the side to have an idea of what she looks and thinks like. I'm also writing a book but my book is way different than this in the terms of "a strange little town" mine is more like 3 realms each with a different race/kind of people. In one realm there are demons. in another there are hybrids, shifters, and elementals. In the third realm there are the angels and fallen angels. My main characters name is Darkheart and she is a demon, angel, and wolf shifter. but there's a twist she has a curse on her placed by her younger brother that is in her quadruplet and later on he goes and poisons their parents who later die after she tries to heal them using magic. Which sends her into a downward spiral where she almost kills herself but is stopped by her *spoiler* soulmate Alex. Soon after Darkheart starts to come out of her depression and smiles and seems to come to life for the first time in 3 years after her parents deaths. about 6 months after Alex askes Darkheart to be his girlfriend. everything is great until its not when the
curse takes effect. Alex driven by rage at his brother Axel who is also in love with her takes
action and kisses Darkheart. with this new found rage Alex kills Axel. he denies the realization that he killed his younger twin brother and blames it on Darkheart. this hurts Darkheart and she flees after alex attempts to kill her but is pulled off by his younger brothers Andrew and Asher. this sends Darkheart back into a downward spiral but its worse this time she succeeds in killing herself. Seeing her parents expressions she realizes that she has to fight this and face Alex.

User avatar
6 Reviews

Points: 361
Reviews: 6

Sat May 08, 2021 11:11 pm
JdoggyGirl says...

One of my close friends came up with this story idea, and she's gotten at least 5 of us helping with writing and refining it. We haven't been able to come to an agreement on whether it should be called the Cursed Generation (my suggestion) or the Cursed Children (My friends'). I think Cursed Generation mainly because there are so many books out there by that same name (most notably the Harry Potter one). The chapters flip from character to character, and Melody is the mainest of the four main characters. Nora, Melody's younger sister, gets kidnapped for being special, and the three others have to get her back. I think at this point no one except my friend fully knows where this story is going, and I think it's amazing! She would add a few paragraphs, and then we would go over the whole story again, finding little itty bitty things to change. The first chapter, then, has been gone over the most. Most of the other chapters aren't as well written quite yet, but they're getting there. The chapters are pretty short, but we have 9 done, and a tenth on the way. Any suggestions?

Everything’s edible if you’re immortal.
— Feltrix