Gods word

Hey there, I enjoyed reading your poem I thought I'd leave my thoughts.

Gray and gloomy,
mad and dreary.
Unwanted and unhappy,
yet welcomed with a smile.

You open your poem by using these words that make the ready truly feel this gloomy sense. I like how you use these visuals of the weather to connect the reader with a feeling. To me, this feeling seems to be a person who was living, but with something missing from their life. They felt anger at what? Perhaps at life, but not really being sure why, or because they did not have anyone to guide them. They describe the weather as being unwanted and unhappy, which I think is a reflection about how they see themselves.

Singing and dancing,
Yet frowning all the while

Mad and sad
But shes not bad
She just a little hurt

An interesting thing about gloomy weather is that it is not morally or inherently 'bad' in any way. I imagine a person who can still love the rain; perhaps they sing and dance, while it still makes them cold and feel alone. Perhaps they have no one to dance with, so that is what makes it feel gloomy. Our perspective shifts to a girl, described as mad and sad, but not bad. I like the little bit of rhyming that you did there. I like this point you make. She has these feelings, but that does not make her bad. Suffering is not bad. Pain is not a sin. What she did not know was not her fault.

She opened up Gods word
Then came the sun
The skys opened up
The angels sang a song of praise

From the language used in your poem and your username, I think that this poem focuses on Christianity. Here, she opens the Bible, the word of God. This gloomy weather dissipates. She can finally see through the gloom. It was like the entire sky opened to her and she saw angels. Perhaps they were always there, but she was unaware. And now, things will never be the way they were before, because of what she has felt and seen and heard. She will never be alone again, with this knowledge.

With just three little words
Then started the birds
The stars rejoiced
for she has made the right choice

I am curious as to what the three words are, in this poem? When I first read it, I assumed it was the first three words in the book of Genesis, "In the beginning," perhaps symbolizing the beginning of a new life, a new birth, a new girl that she has become. But I could see it being other things. The girl has received this confirmation within herself that she made the right choice. Even within the writing style, there is such a shift in attitude and confidence in these lines. Her faith has made her strong.

Gone, she had to leave for a while
But she came back wearing a new smile
The way he changed her
Now shes living out his word

I really like this last verse, the part where you say that she had to leave for a while. Finally, she gets to wear a smile that she wants to wear. Now, I know for some people who are Christian, they capitalize He and His when referring to God. That is just one thing I noticed that you did not do, but there is no right or wrong. It can symbolize a higher level of respect for a title like God, like a name. I liked how you said that she left. What was gone, returned. And what a relief that must have been!

I really enjoyed your poem and reading about your journey. I look forward to reading more of your poems soon!

Your friend,
Ellie