Young Writers Society

I humbly thank everyone for their feedback. I shall take your opinions to heart

Hmm, this single paragraph style poem isn't something I usually read, but this one in particular caught me eye.
You seem to want peace in the world judging by this poem. It's common, but now bad at all. Greatly executed and its flow is nice and smoooothe. Heh heh, anyway. Because the poem is about peace I don't quite understand it, but the poem is light and the way everything was tired together puts it all together.
~Dark

I really enjoyed this piece. I like how you tied everything in to create a more intricate piece, like different instruments create a symphony. The imagery was very impressive, and even though it was a piece about happiness, I could see the small bit of gravity in it. You managed to show that the contrast of darkness is what forms the glory of light. Overall, nice job.

I enjoy the lightness of the work. There are a few grammatical errors, but I'm not sure if they're in place for emphasis or if they are actually errors. The simplicity of the poem is definitely creates a calming, soothing effect which is good. Very nice job, I really liked it!

Hey there! I'd like to review this one!

First off, you need to know that you are very talented at describing things. Your images were very vivid, beautiful, and striking. This is the best thing about the entire piece. Lines like: "...the precious scent of flowers filling my nose", "nature calls for attention...", "birds sing a song of morning praise...", and "the storm expressed its fury last night" play with all the human senses and are used in such a way that the reader is immediately transported to this setting, or is reminded of a similar setting that he/she may already know.

While you must be commended for use excellent use of imagery, I've got some issues with the piece as a whole. What is your purpose in writing this piece? You called it prose, but it's under the poetry tab. Is it prose or poetry, or both? I think you need to answer these questions for yourself and look at the piece with your answers in mind so that the reader is able to fully understand what you're trying to say.

Overall though, I think it's well-crafted, whatever it may be, and I can't wait to read more from you. You're a good writer!

Hey Innergy!

It's a shame yws ate the formatting on this, but I'll do my best to review it anyway.

This is really nice! I don't just mean nice as in good, I mean that it's a really sweet gem to find amidst a sea of angsty and bitter poetry. It left me with a sense of calm and I was more than happy to read it three times over (which is rare since I'm really not a poetry person.)

I'm not sure what tone you were going for though. This feels like the kind of voice over you would have on a Discovery Channel advert, which, if that's what you were going for then it's fine. I couldn't really get a sense of the narrator though, only the wonder of the things surrounding them.

I guess with a bit less fancy language and more specific references (warm bread, cold milk, faces of children, are all quite generic) then you could make it more personal.

Overall I think this is great, and I really enjoyed reading it. Nice work!