Highs and Lows

by Iamwhoyouknow

  • Poetry
  • Dramatic · Realistic

Published July 21, 2012

I've been told happiness involves a certain balance between highs and lows. Go too high and you might fall. Get too low and it's too hard to climb back up. I've climbed too high and when I fell, I fell hard. I'm constantly searching for my way back up. What if you fell but still keep falling? How do you reach towards above? What if you make it back to the top only to find a strange place? Not the place you remember from long ago which still lingers in your heart. What do you become then?
Comments & reviews · 3
User avatar
Iamwhoyouknow Comment
Iamwhoyouknow commented Comment · Jul 22, 2012

I wrote this years ago. I just wanted it to be my first post on here. Sorry, I know it's mediocre.

Random avatar
Bobbywalker
Review
Bobbywalker wrote a review Review · Jul 21, 2012

Hi!
First of all, you need to edit. You have to split it up. Ok. I like the originality and the creativity. It feels mystical, and still so clear. It builds up quite nice, and there are no visible typos, and grammar is ok. You have a good use of your vocabulary, and that's nice. Espeically I love that you used simple words for a simple poem. I've seen so many people fall int the trap where they use so many advanced words, noone understands anything. If you work more with your build up, and remeber stanzas, you'll be really good going to become a better poet. Good going. Now spamming for extra points. You go girl.

8/10 if I don't give a damn about stanzas. But I do: 6/10 :( Fix that and I'll give you your deserved 8/10 :)

Great love, Bob Walker!


Iamwhoyouknow
Iamwhoyouknow replied · Jul 22, 2012

Thank you! I really appreciate it. :)



To have more, you have to become more. Don't wish it was easier - wish you were better. For things to change, you have to change, and for things to get better, you have to get better.
— Jim Rohn