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125,005 Literary Works • 672,801 Reviews
I wrote this years ago. I just wanted it to be my first post on here. Sorry, I know it's mediocre.
Hi!
Fix that and I'll give you your deserved 8/10 
First of all, you need to edit. You have to split it up. Ok. I like the originality and the creativity. It feels mystical, and still so clear. It builds up quite nice, and there are no visible typos, and grammar is ok. You have a good use of your vocabulary, and that's nice. Espeically I love that you used simple words for a simple poem. I've seen so many people fall int the trap where they use so many advanced words, noone understands anything. If you work more with your build up, and remeber stanzas, you'll be really good going to become a better poet. Good going. Now spamming for extra points. You go girl.
8/10 if I don't give a damn about stanzas. But I do: 6/10
Great love, Bob Walker!
Thank you! I really appreciate it.