“Are you ready?” Wanda asked. Katelyn buckled her seat belt.
“Yep. Let ‘er down!” She yelled, causing Wanda to laugh lightly.
The Jet descended onto a farm. In the distance, a farmhouse stood. Two figures were outlined
in the dusk sun. As they got closer, Katelyn saw that it was Nate and his father, Clint Barton.
Katelyn ran over to them, hugging Nate tightly.
“Hi!” She said when she let go, “I’ve missed you! How’s life on the farm?”
“It’s fine.” Nate shrugged. He smiled and looked at her. “I’ve missed you too.”
“Alright, no more, Lovebirds!” Called Clint from inside the Jet. “We have stuff to do!” Both Nate
and Kate went a red color and climbed back into the jet.
“What are we doing now, Captain?” Nate asked, looking at Steve. The rest of the team look at
him, too.
“We have one more person to recruit.”
“Who?” Asked Clint, curiously.
“Ant-Man. Otherwise known as, Scott Lang.” At this, Sam groaned out loud. Everybody stared
at him.
“Sorry, it’s just that we don’t get along well.” He explained.
“Well, you’re gonna have to work on that, buddy.” Said Bucky.
“Shut it, Snowflake,” Sam said frowning. Katelyn burst out laughing.
“Says the guy in the bird outfit.” Retorted Bucky, scowling. At this Nate snorted.
“It isn’t a bird outfit! They’re wings!” Sam whined.
“They called it a bird costume on the government paper…Just saying.” Bucky said, smirking.
“I think Snowflake sounds a lot better than Winter Soldier. Don’t you think, Sam?” asked
Katelyn. “Winter Soldier sounds way too creepy.”
“Yeah, Katelyn. Snowflake DOES sound better than Winter Soldier. What do you think, Wanda?”
Sam said, turning to Wanda.
“I agree,” Wanda said, smirking at Bucky, who glared back. “What about you, Clint Barton?
Snowflake or Winter Soldier?” Wanda asked.
“Well…To be honest, I like the Winter Soldier one better.”
“Thank you, Barton.” Bucky said, still pouting over the fact that most people thought he should
be called “Snowflake”.
“Alright guys, calm it down. We are about to land.” Steve said quickly, breaking up the talk
before someone made another remark. The Quinjet landed little ways out of a city. “We have a
little bit of a walk ahead of us. Lang’s quarters are in the city, but I can’t land the Quinjet in the
city for obvious reasons.” Steve continued, glancing at everyone. “Who will go with me? I don’t
need everyone, just two others.”
Wanda and Clint both raised their hands.
“I can go.” They both said in unison. Steve nodded toward them.
“Thanks.” He said gratefully. “I’ll see the rest of you in about an hour, okay? Don’t get into any
trouble. Bucky,” Steve said, after a sudden idea, “Start planning our strategies. We are going to
need plans of attack and defense.”
Bucky nodded and said, “Yeah, sure, Captain. Will do.”
“Wait-dad- can I help Bucky?” Kate asked as Steve headed out the door, “It’ll help me with my
planning skills!” She added quickly. Steve looked at Bucky to see if he was okay with it. Bucky
shrugged as if to say that it was fine.
“Okay,” Steve said slowly. “I’ll see you later; we really should get going.” And with that, he left.
“So do you two know anything about Lang?” Steve asked as they trudged through fields of corn,
cabbage, and soybeans.
“Nah. Just that he’s gonna fanboy when he sees you and that he’s kinda annoying.” Hawkeye
said with a slight smile. Steve smiled back dryly.
“Thanks for that information.” He said.
“What is his power, Rogers?” asked Wanda curiously.
“He can manipulate his size and communicate with insects like ants,” Steve replied briskly. He
wasn’t totally sure what other powers Ant-Man had.
“Well, he sounds like he’ll be useful,” Wanda said, hopefully. They had reached the end of the
field and were finally on the outskirts of the city. This was obviously the downtown, dark, and
dark part of the city. The streets and alleyways were covered with dirt and garbage and the
apartments were grimy and run-down.
“Please tell me this is NOT where he lives,” Clint muttered under his breath.
“I don’t think he lives here, but this is where he does most of his work.” Replied Steve, stepping
over a large pile of rotting garbage.
“Captain America? Is that really you? Oh my gosh, it’s really him.” The last part was muttered
with ecstatic joy.
“And that would be him.” Said Clint, glancing at Steve, who was grinning at Scott Lang.
Scott had brown hair and eyes. He wasn’t tall, but he wasn’t short, either. He was about five
foot eleven. Ant-Man had on a T-shirt and jeans and was carrying a sports bag that Steve could
only assume had his superhero suit in it. Scott stepped forward and began to shake the
Captain’s hand.
“Name’s Scott Lang, Captain. I’m can’t say how thrilled I am to meet you. It’s just so cool! I’m
probably shaking your hand way too much, aren’t I.” He added, looking down at his hand, which
was still shaking Steve’s.
“Anyone tell you what we’re up against?” Steve asked Scott.
“Uh, no. All anybody said was that you were going rebel. Which, may I say, is just freaking
amazing!”
Wanda burst into laughter, which she quickly turned into a hacking cough. Scott turned to her,
looking slightly hurt.
“I’m not entirely stupid, I’ll have you know.”
“Sorry, it’s just…It was funny.” Wanda finished lamely. To cover up the awkward moment, Steve
cleared his throat.
“We really should be going. And Ant-Man, we’d be pleased if you would join our team.” Steve
said, turning to Clint and Wanda.
“I’d be happy to, Captain,” Scott said excitedly.
Clint, Wanda, and Steve all grinned. “Great.”
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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Hey, LittleLee's here to review your work!
Forgive me if there are any mistakes, I'm writing this on a very loony tablet that keeps doing things without asking me.
It is just waaaaaaay too long. Don't do that. You put in a gap between almost every single thing, rendering your work useless. The story is rather interesting, but I'd like some more action in it.
The end Inc is way too abrupt. Make it more interesting. If I'd read that part first, I wouldn't have bothered to read the rest.
I don't have much else to say, there's just the occasional grammatical mistake and/or misspelled words. And, you don't need to PUNTUATE everything so much. Too much is bad, as well as too little.
I am sorry if my review is too critical of your work!
I'd like to see more, but edited work!
Greenteas and salutations my dear friend!
My name is GreenTea and I'm here to review! I hope none of the constructive criticism will be taken negatively and the positive comments will help inspire you to continue. Let's get into the review!
I like this unique take on the Avengers series! I personally don't know the series very well but I know enough to understand who the characters are and such. This story was good however, there was a lot of dialogue and not a lot of description, so it seemed more like a theatrical script than a chapter. I would've liked to see a little more description in this especially since it seems like you are telling me a story rather than showing me what's going on. Regardless, I enjoyed it and would like to see more.
Time for comments!
1) "The Jet descended onto a farm. In the distance, a farmhouse stood. Two figures were outlined
in the dusk sun. As they got closer, Katelyn saw that it was Nate and his father, Clint Barton.
Katelyn ran over to them, hugging Nate tightly."[/b"
This is a very awkward format for a story. There is a lot of space between lines and makes it very hard to follow. Maybe condense it a little bit?
2) [b]"“Captain America? Is that really you? Oh my gosh, it’s really him.” The last part was muttered
with ecstatic joy.
“And that would be him.” Said Clint, glancing at Steve, who was grinning at Scott Lang."
Again, very awkward. There wasn't a whole lot of feeling in the "Oh my gosh it's Captain America" bit. Maybe add more description to give more feeling. Also, there should be a comma and a lower case 's' between "him" and "said".
Overall I think it could use some work. It sounds very two dimensional, but with some editing, I think it has great potential.
Well, that’s all I have for now! Hope I gave you a quali-tea review!
再見
Zàijiàn!
~GreenTea