z

Young Writers Society


16+ Language Mature Content

Be Careful Who You Trust Chapter 10.2

by Honora


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language and mature content.

Previously: After having a vision of her Mom's death, she rushes off to the hospital with a worried James and Mrs. Borden behind her. When she gets to the hospital room, her Mom is fine...until a blonde nurse comes to ruin it all. With a new sense of purpose now that her Mom is dead, she searches for this blonde.

I fidgeted in the elevator. It was going so slow! How long did it take to get to the main floor? The metallic doors finally opened wide enough for me to slip through first. I ran to the double doored entrance and burst through them onto the sidewalk beyond. People walked around me and gave me a funny look as I scoured my surroundings for the blonde. Any other day, I would have cared.

I whipped around and tripped on my own feet, causing me to fall flat on my face. I gasped sharply as I got up and looked at the palm of my hand. A piece of broken glass, with its serrated edges was dug deeply into the flesh of my hand. In anger, I ripped it out and ignored the blood that had started to pour out slowly.

When back on my feet I continued my search for the woman. I grunted in frustration, stomping my foot like a child when she didn’t come to sight. I ran around the parking lot for a while, hoping to catch a glimpse of her but to no avail. She was long gone.

“Katie!” I heard James yell from the other side of the parking lot. I watched him as he jogged over to me. Any signs of annoyance he had before was completely gone and was replaced by worried softness to his face. His shoulders were still tight but I passed that off for worry.

He placed his hand on my shoulder and before I knew it, I was sobbing uncontrollably in his shoulder. I was aware of Mrs. Borden watching us but I shut my eyes and let James hold me. He smelled of sweat and salt. The salt, no doubt, came from my eyes gushing themselves out. He held me tight and his lips found my ear where he whispered something. I couldn’t hear him over myself but I guessed they was some reassuring words.

It felt like an eternity before I pulled myself away from his grasp. Reluctantly, mind you. I could have stayed there forever.

He smiled sadly and brushed a strand of loose hair behind my ear. My face felt wet and sticky but that didn’t stop him from wiping the tears away gently with his thumbs. He wrapped an arm around my shoulder and turned, where Mrs. Borden stood silently. She waited until we walked to where she stood before taking my hand gently. They both led me to the car in silence.

I’m sorry for your loss, Katie. It must be hard on you, Zander paused for a long moment, especially at such a time in your life.

Too tired to feel any anger towards him, I simply replied. Thank you, Zander.

I shuddered and wrapped my arms around my knees as I settled into the seat of the car. I didn’t know if I was supposed to stay at the hospital for the doctors to ask me questions but I didn’t argue with Mrs. Borden as she started driving home. Well, her house.

Single tears flowed slowly my cheeks and my eyes began to burn. Where would I go now? It was almost a definite that Gabriel wouldn’t be able to keep me around with his job as a police officer. And if I was being honest with myself, I wouldn’t be able to live under his hand. He was never as bad as Dad but he still had an awful temper that would have me tiptoeing around him, trying not to bring any attention to myself.

But surely he wouldn’t let me go into the system. Would he?

I sniffled and wiped my eyes with the bottom of my shirt. I couldn’t do this now. I couldn’t think about what was to come when I could barely handle what was happening at the present moment.

James relaxed in his seat and glanced over at me. He asked me something, his tone soft and imploring. His blue eyes sunk deep into my own and I was lost for a second in his concern. It wasn’t until he repeated his question that it actually sunk in what he had said.

“Are you okay?” He asked again.

I sucked in a deep breath, hoping it wouldn’t cause my voice to crack, “Yeah, I’ll be alright.”

He grabbed my hand gently and held onto it. The small squeeze he gave it was reassuring and I smiled to myself, thinking about how only a few days ago, if he would have held my hand, I would have swooned. I knew though, that he was only doing all this to be helpful.

I winced as he touched the palm of my hand more sharply.

He basically pounced on it and asked, “What happened? You’re bleeding!”

I looked at my hand and choked out a laugh, “I fell and a piece of glass caught itself in my hand. Not thinking, I ripped it out. Don’t worry, James, it’s better than it looks.”

Despite my reassurance not to worry, he looked at it thoroughly. Every time he touched it, it sent a jolt of stinging pain down to my wrist but I didn’t have the heart to tell him he was making it worse while he was trying to help.

I chuckled, thinking of every movie out there and hoping to lighten the mood I said, “Isn’t this the part where you tear off the bottom of your shirt to wrap my hand up?”

He chuckled and my eyes widened in anticipation at his smirk. I knew that look and that a sarcastic remark was about to follow. He was more like me than I sometimes realized.

“If you wanted me to take off my clothes, you could have just asked.”

I gaped my mouth open in fake scandal before rolling my eyes and slapping his arm playfully, hoping to shrug off the uncomfortable topic. A topic that closed too much in on the truth of my wishes. The truth of my desires.

I sighed a quiet sigh of relief when we pulled up to their house. I practically jumped out of the car but waited for James to get out behind me before walking to the front deck. Mrs. Borden was awfully quiet. She hadn’t said a word during the drive and the look on her face troubled me. The small fact that James had joked about his nudity and she didn’t reprimand him was enough to curdle milk.

What was making her so upset? I didn’t think it had anything to do with Mom; the two hated each other. Maybe it was more about the effect it was having on me. I’m an orphan now, after all.

Once we stepped inside, I couldn’t take her silence anymore, “Mrs. Borden?” She looked my way so I took that as a cue to continue, “You haven’t said a word. May I ask what’s wrong?”

She sighed as she kicked off her sandals. She stayed quiet until she took a seat at the counter, “I’m trying to think of where we’re going to put you.”

Confused, I asked, “What do you mean? Where you’re going to put me?”

If I had ever seen the woman anywhere close to rolling her eyes, it was now, “You’re obviously going to need a place to stay. I have already contacted Gabriel about the situation this morning and he told me that if worse came to worse, he wouldn’t be able to care for you. Therefore, you are going to need a new home and I’ll be damned if I let you go to a foster home.”

I wanted to say something but nothing came out. I just stood there gaping at her.

She smiled kindly and said, “I know. Everything’s hard to take in at the moment. Why don’t you go lay down for a while. Maybe James will keep you company until Jennifer gets back from school.” She gave me a sly wink and I blushed slightly. Perhaps she hadn’t been so oblivious in the car.

The thought passed though because a wave of fatigue hit me like a brick wall and for the first time since it all started, I was out of adrenaline to stay energized with.

“Thank you, Mrs. Borden, for everything. You’ve been an amazing help.” I smiled and James walked with me upstairs to Jen’s room.

James walked behind me as I took the wood steps slowly, taking my time. I couldn’t explain it but I felt like I was hit by a truck and left as roadkill to be hit numerous more times. When I put some thought into it, I couldn’t decide which disastrous event in my life was the truck.

“Hello?” James said in a sing-song voice. It wasn’t until then that I realized I was standing at the top step, not moving as I had stared off into my thoughts.

“Sorry. I just got lost in thought, I guess.” I stuttered in reply as I forced my feet to move. I dragged myself into Jen’s room. I plopped down onto her bed face first with a big phlufff as her endless amount of pillows encased me. I scooted over when I felt a finger poke my ribs and felt oddly content as another phlufff announced James’ arrival into my space.

I caught my breath as his shoulder brushed against my arm. He was laying on his back and the steady rise and fall of his chest moved the blankets around him softly. We didn’t say a thing but rather just lay there in silence. It was perfect.

Within minutes, I found myself drifting off and didn’t fight him as he moved my head onto his shoulder. I subconsciously moved my arm to fall on his abdomen, leaving my hand on his chest. My heartbeat slowed down to the rhythm of his breathing and I fell into a deep sleep, unaware of another’s presence in the room. 


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar
37 Reviews


Points: 221
Reviews: 37

Donate
Mon Dec 02, 2019 9:53 pm
View Likes
Raelyn wrote a review...



“I’m sorry for your loss, Katie. It must be hard on you, Zander paused for a long moment, especially at such a time in your life. Too tired to feel any anger towards him, I simply replied. Thank you, Zander.”- That moment when honora shatters your heart into a million pieces, and the sun pass and it sparkles… Are you okay?” He asked again.” NO you brainless male she isn’t okay! She just lost her mom and you are asking her is she is okay. “He grabbed my hand gently and held onto it. The small squeeze he gave it was reassuring and I smiled to myself, thinking about how only a few days ago, if he would have held my hand, I would have swooned. I knew though, that he was only doing all this to be helpful.” Ya know for someone who really is bad with males she sure gets a lot of attention and care from some verry attracive ones. OMG LIBERTY!!!!!! I just read your wall looking for james, he is a wolf?? WHAT??? Omg that makes so much more sense. Ahahah instead of like twilight where it is a vampire versus a wolf it is versus A wolf, a hunter, and a vampire:) A love square. Hey is there any more chapters about Nathan’s girlfriend if not I might just delete that detail from a page. ““If you wanted me to take off my clothes, you could have just asked. I gaped my mouth open in fake scandal before rolling my eyes and slapping his arm playfully, hoping to shrug off the uncomfortable topic. A topic that closed too much in on the truth of my wishes. The truth of my desires.” Wow what perfect humors scandalizim. I bet you are the wittiest, funniest, savage in really life. Cause all of your character have a special fancy sass to them. “She gave me a sly wink and I blushed slightly.” OMG OMG when then moms gett all spicy I am dead. So sweet… Within minutes, I found myself drifting off and didn’t fight him as he moved my head onto his shoulder. I subconsciously moved my arm to fall on his abdomen, leaving my hand on his chest. My heartbeat slowed down to the rhythm of his breathing and I fell into a deep sleep, unaware of another’s presence in the room.” The sheer demand of him moving her head on his chest is sooooooo cute, god I am such a helpless romantic i need to find a man:( Bruh literaly why is katie cute with ever hot male in this story… Katie has like 12 crushes>-< That is a lil confusing. I guess when your long life love has avoided you, you tend to fall for a lot to make up for his absences but it would never work…. I would know:( BRAVO honora Bravo:)




Honora says...


Hey there!! I am super happy you like it! I am thinking that the drama is getting a bit much so it will definitely be edited when I rewrite. Right now I am just writing until I finish the book and then i am gonna go through it! :D
P.S. I just told my friend that you said I must be the wittiest, funniest, savage in real like and she totally agrees with you! XD



Raelyn says...


bahahahaha if I go to canada I want to meet you, and when I publish my book you better be ready to be on my dedication and thanks page:)



User avatar
6 Reviews


Points: 25
Reviews: 6

Donate
Mon Jul 01, 2019 2:37 pm
View Likes
Uni wrote a review...



Hey there! Uni here for a review.
How are you doing? Hope you are fine.
Sorry for not reviewing this earlier! This is just as good as the last ones. I must say you have me hooked. ;)
This chapter is fantastic and brilliantly written.

I'm so excited to be back and start reviewing your story! Hope you're doing well today or tonight, depending on what side of the world you're on. Anyways, let's start! :D

'I fidgeted in the elevator. It was going so slow! How long did it take to get to the main floor?'
In the first line, I don't think an exclamation mark is needed because my english teacher at school advises me to restrict using so many exclamation marks. I know it does create suspense, but use when of utmost necessity.
Anyway, the beginning of the chapter is good.

'The small squeeze he gave it was reassuring and I smiled to myself, thinking about how only a few days ago, if he would have held my hand, I would have swooned. I knew though, that he was only doing all this to be helpful.'
I found this part a bit choppy. Maybe you can fix it. Whether you fix it or not, this story remains fantastic.


I really liked the expressions you use in the following part. Like 'sing-song'. This is one reason why I joined Young writers society. To learn new things from experienced and amazing people. Thank you for being an inspiration. You always make me wonder how you come up with so many new ideas to write so many successful chapters.

'A piece of broken glass, with its serrated edges was dug deeply into the flesh of my hand.'
In the above line, a comma is needed after edges. since you are giving a description of the broken glass.
But, that's me. I am here just for a review. You do whatever you like. Up to you. Totally.

'I ran around the parking lot for a while, hoping to catch a glimpse of her but to no avail. She was long gone.'
Here also, a comma can be added after her and before but.


Again, superb expressions.

'The small fact that James had joked about his nudity and she didn’t reprimand him was enough to curdle milk.'


'He held me tight and his lips found my ear where he whispered something. I couldn’t hear him over myself but I guessed they was some reassuring words.'

Some mistakes in the above lines like 'they were' instead of 'they was' as words are plural. But I know it must have been typing mistake. The same happens with me sometimes. Perhaps, all the time. :)

Have a nice day and keep posting on YWS.




Honora says...


Hey there! Thank you so much for review. I am so glad you like it and look forward to hearing from you in the future! :)



User avatar
155 Reviews


Points: 11208
Reviews: 155

Donate
Sun Jun 30, 2019 5:11 am
View Likes
Toboldlygo wrote a review...



Hey there! Toboldlygo here with a review for you!

This chapter is fantastic! I really love what you're doing with the story. However, I do have some thoughts about the characters. Name, Katie is sounding more and more fickle with each chapter. She thinks Zander is cute but he's not and she loves Nathan but is in love with James? I don't follow all this teen romance drama very well. Besides the fickle Katie, however, I do like the story.

Question about Zander. At first it seemed that he didn't want to be bonded to Katie, but now he does? Was he trying to be manipulative before this? Or did his feelings change? We haven't seen much of him since the chapter in the warehouse, and it would be nice to actually get inside his head to explore his character more. I'm curious about him. Also, where is Nathan during all of this?

At the beginning, there was a woman who arrived to kill monsters. Who is she? Will she be coming back into the story? It seems that she's been mostly forgotten, and I'm curious about when she'll come back? Also, what about the creepy doctor who asked Katie all those weird questions? Will he be coming back?

I think this story is in a great place to explore these questions and more and take it to a new level. I'm looking forward to see what you do with it!

Happy Writing!

Toboldlygo




Honora says...


Thank you for the review! I appreciate it! I will try make her less fickle because I can see what you are getting at! The monster killing woman will be coming back in pretty quick as well. :) basically the next chapter lol but I see why you would think she had been forgotten lol.
Thanks again!



User avatar
232 Reviews


Points: 1378
Reviews: 232

Donate
Sun Jun 30, 2019 12:29 am
View Likes
LadyBug wrote a review...



Hey girl! I'm sorry this is late but I was waiting for review day go Team Awesome! and I'm just going to go through and stop whenever I see something worth pointing out. K? letz go!

HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME ON SUCH A CLIFFHANGER YOU EVIL DEMON AUGH! Sorry, my mood right now lol

It felt like an eternity before I pulled myself away from his grasp. Reluctantly, mind you. I could have stayed there forever.

It was reluctantly sounds more flowey.

If I had ever seen the woman anywhere close to rolling her eyes, it was now, “You’re obviously going to need a place to stay. I have already contacted Gabriel about the situation this morning and he told me that if worse came to worse, he wouldn’t be able to care for you. Therefore, you are going to need a new home and I’ll be damned if I let you go to a foster home.”

I do have to say that I had to re-read this about three times, watch the choppy flow please!

Within minutes, I found myself drifting off and didn’t fight him as he moved my head onto his shoulder. I subconsciously moved my arm to fall on his abdomen, leaving my hand on his chest. My heartbeat slowed down to the rhythm of his breathing and I fell into a deep sleep, unaware of another’s presence in the room.

I would say shorten the sentence and watch fr unneeded details.

I know I usually focus on your word use and flow and all that but let me applaud the actual content. I think you have such a talent for writing and this is romantic, cute, funny, witty, and I love it and the cliffhangers make me just want more!

You deserve more reads and I'm always scared that my reviews that point out every little flaw will make you want to stop writing. But you do know I mean it in a helpful way and not in a mean way?

Oh well, I have cake to eat. Sorry for the borderline useless review and please post the next part soon :P

Professor Jade




Honora says...


Thank you for the review! Don%u2019t worry, I take all your reviews in a good sense because that is the way you mean them! :)



User avatar
453 Reviews


Points: 825
Reviews: 453

Donate
Fri Jun 28, 2019 5:04 pm
View Likes
Lib wrote a review...



I’m sorry for your loss, Katie. It must be hard on you, Zander paused for a long moment, especially at such a time in your life.

Too tired to feel any anger towards him, I simply replied. Thank you, Zander.


I like you know, Zander. You're not too bad, after all, eh? But lemme decide first. If the coming chapters show you as an idiot, I'll hate you. If not, I'll like you.

Well, here at least I know he has a heart...

My heartbeat slowed down to the rhythm of his breathing and I fell into a deep sleep, unaware of another’s presence in the room.


O.O

Um, kinda creepy. Who the heck is this??? I have a feeling it might be Nathan, but that's just a guess. Or it could be Zander. But wait, you have to invite a vampire first for them to come into your house, right? Yeah...

So maybe Nate?

I'm not sure.




Lib says...


Woops, this was not meant to be a review!! I'll give you the points, @Honora! Sorry about that!



Honora says...


Lol thank you! I guess you will have to wait and see who is in the room! ;)



Lib says...


Hurry up with the next chapter!! Or I'll die because of the suspense. ;)



Honora says...


Haha well I will have to see. I am pretty busy so it might be a while :(



Lib says...


:O
Oh well. I'll just have to sit in front of the computer, and continuously refresh the notifications page and see if I get any from you that's related to the book. ;)



Honora says...


Lol I will try work on it but we will see :)



Lib says...


Alright. Take your time. I want it to be perfect when I read it! (:



Honora says...


Perfect!? Way to put the pressure on :-P XD



Lib says...


Oh my gosh, I didn't mean to put pressure! Just - I mean like - um... Just I want it to be good? Uhh, sorry!!! I DID NOT MEAN IT THAT WAY! Sorry!



Honora says...


Lmao it%u2019s fine. I didn%u2019t mean thy for real. I was just being a pain in the butt XD sorry for freaking you out



Lib says...


YOU FREAKED ME OUT! Lol.



Honora says...


Sorry! :)



Lib says...


Np. Lol.



User avatar
103 Reviews


Points: 810
Reviews: 103

Donate
Wed Jun 26, 2019 8:20 pm
View Likes
shieldmaiden says...



Wait - another's presence in the room? What's that supposed to mean!? Why do you keep ending things like this? They are as bad as cliffhangers.

Love this chapter! Really nice way to wind things down after such a terribly heart wrenching chapter last time. James and Katie are cute, but I am still attached to Zander (believe it or not) and love Nathan. So, does she actually have a real thing with James? Because, I get more vibes off of Nathan and her when they are together. They seem more real. And they have more of a past. Him being a vampire slayer and her being a vampire's soulmate makes for a pretty interesting love story. Not nearly as interesting as a vampire falling in love with his betrothed, but then that is perhaps overdone and too cliche. However, i have no idea how you are going to make this story go along. I'm just here for the ride - and honestly - it's terrifying!

Please be nice to my poor heart and don't kill off Nathan (or Zander)!

-Shieldmaiden (aka Cecy)




Honora says...


Hey cecy! Thanks for the review! To tell you the honest truth, I don%u2019t even know where I am going with this book so I%u2019m right there with you on this terrifying ride! XD



shieldmaiden says...


Nice to have the support (except I know you have an evil genius mind)! ;)




Why can't I put the entire Bee Movie in the quote generator? Would you prefer if I put in the Shrek script instead?
— CaptainJack