To God

by Heather_BlackCain

Published September 3, 2006

To God

I’m sorry,
But it’s like a star falling in day…
And God,
I still don’t know how to say,
I’m sorry,
But death will take me soon…
And God,
She still just stares toward the doom.

You can’t be like this,
Yeah, everything’s come back to this…
You’ll never take it down,
Yeah, it’s just like the sound,
Of me screaming…

I’m sorry,
But I just can’t go away…
And God,
You still don’t want to say,
I’m sorry,
But the pain will never come…
And God,
Please tell me that she’s done.

You can’t be like this,
Yeah, I’ll never forget this…
You’ll always come around,
Yeah, it’s just like the sound,
Of me dying…

Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
xanthan gum
Comment
xanthan gum commented Comment · Sep 7, 2006

This sounds more like song lyrics than anything. It would sound prettier with a melody. I agree with DD.

User avatar
Dream Deep
Review
Dream Deep wrote a review Review · Sep 7, 2006

Great job!

Heh, I kept going through saying 'this one's my favorite stanza... no, this one'.

Not too profound and lyrical, but nice nontheless.

Good job! :wink:

User avatar
Shine
Comment
Shine commented Comment · Sep 4, 2006

Starting was a bit sudden and confusing.
Body was fine.But the starting makes the whole piece confusing.

Keep writing.:)



Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.
— Mark Twain