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Night Witches. WW2

by Gwenavear

Vera's nerves where on edge, it was growing dark fast. The night air was cold and sharp. It was really happening, of course she knew what she had signed up for. The fact was it hadn’t sunk in till now, she was going to fly, while being fired at. So many had lost their lives, and she could to. They had drilled and trained hard, a year of learning to fly. Forming strategies and studying maps of the areas they would attack. Everything had led up to this moment. And she was terrified of what would happen.

“Hey, you dreaming or something?” With a jolt Vera looked around, The stars had started coming out, though it was not fully dark yet. The girl that had spoken to her had slick black hair. Her skin was light and fair, though her hands revealed that she was a hard worker. Her name was Alexis. “don’t look so glum, we’ll come back” Her voice was cheery, it seamed as if she had no worries in the world. As if going into enemy territory during a war was just an adventure from a book, and not incredibly dangerous. That was how she always was, everything they did together. Had just been the next great adventure in life. Alexis gave her a slight push. Vera attempted a half smile “yeah, see you in the morning, if we make it back” Alexis looked exasperated. “Always the optimist aren’t you? Well we best get a move on” Alexis gave her one more encouraging look before hurrying to her own small air craft.

That was another thing that had Vera worried, they had the flimsiest airships in the whole soviet army. The Po-2 The thought of how easily they could be shot down was unnerving. The planes where meant only to be used to train new soldiers, but providing better supplies for women was obviously not a top priority. Vera shook her head to rid it of doubts, No point in worrying about something that is out of your control, thats what her mother had always said. When she was little and was frightened of something her mother would always tell her a story. It was about a brave young girl, and how she could do anything in the world. After the story was told her mother would say, Vera that young girl is you, you can do anything. When she was young, of course it made her feel brave, but now… Now she hung on those words for dear life.

Looking over at her fellow pilots and friends, this could be the last time she saw any of them. Just then a tall and beautiful women started walking towards them. Her name was Marina Raskova. The Person responsible for putting this together. She was strict, and had little tolerance for mistakes. Her methods where effective, working every girl under her command just as hard as every male solider in the war. All the girls looked up to her, she was a symbol of hope and strength. Never did she seam scared of what could happen, but always showed confidence and determination. It was easy to believe that she had never been afraid in her life.

She stopped in front of all of them. Her face showed determination, and if Vera wasn’t mistaken. Did she also see, pride in her eyes? Marina surveyed them and said one word. “Ready” She said it not as a question, but as a command. The Complete silence that followed her words made everyone shift around nervously. No more words where spoken between any of them, Marina nodded to the group of girls that she had brought to this point. With that She climbed into her plain. Everyone else followed suit. The mission had really begun. The 588th Regiment of the soviet army was on it’s way to Germany. 

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6 Reviews

Points: 288
Reviews: 6

Sun Apr 17, 2016 6:41 am
mysterygirl wrote a review...

Hello, Gwenavear! I really liked this story and found that the first sentence instantly hooked me into it. Overall, it was a very good read and I didn't really have any problems with it. There were a few grammatical errors here and there, and maybe a few typos. For instance, "Just then a tall and beautiful *women* started walking towards them." [women should be woman] In addition, I found myself looking for more details in your descriptions, especially when it came to Vera feeling "terrified". Instead of just telling me that Vera was terrified or her "nerves were on the edge" (I actually like that phrase, but you get the point haha), you could add a few phrases/sentences like "her heart almost burst out of her chest," or "she could feel a tingly sensation at her fingertips and her palms started to sweat". Such details would give the reader an idea on *how* terrified Vera feels. I also feel like you could have added more information on the main character (like what the other reviewers stated). Besides that, I not only liked but loved this story! I'm very excited for a part two, if possible. Will Vera die or will she be the only survivor?

Keep writing! :D

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485 Reviews

Points: 21027
Reviews: 485

Sun Apr 10, 2016 11:19 am
Elijah wrote a review...

The fact was it hadn’t sunk in till now, she was going to fly, while being fired at. So many had lost their lives, and she could to.

There are few mistakes around this area and on others also but It did not stop me to continue actually reading this.Some errors here and there but the plot is interesting,I will be honest about it.I am into the fantasy genre anyways so It made me stay for the plot.Combination witches and the wars is not a bad idea.It is something new after all?Something new and interesting is never bad for the readers.I would love It If you could tell us more about the main character but this is our own will.
After all,good job.

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383 Reviews

Points: 19607
Reviews: 383

Sun Apr 03, 2016 11:53 am
Sujana wrote a review...

Aw hell yeah, a work about the Night Witches. Why haven't I picked this up earlier?

Some mistakes I found that you might want to address later on:

-"Had just been the next great adventure in life." This was an unusual fragment of a sentence, and I think it's worth trying to make it into a full sentence, ie It had just been the next great adventure in life.

-"“yeah, see you in the morning, if we make it back” Alexis looked exasperated. “Always the optimist aren’t you? Well we best get a move on”" This is something I've seen in your dialogues--you often forget to put a comma or a period on the inside of the quotation marks, ie "Always the optimist, aren't you? Well, we best get a move on."

-"they had the flimsiest airships in the whole soviet army." Capitalize Soviet (not sure about army though).

-"The planes where meant only to be used to train new soldiers" Were.

-"The Complete silence that followed her words made everyone shift around nervously." You occasionally capitalize words for no reason, such as in this case.

Actual Review:

This was a fun read. In general, I liked the tone of it, and how the main character is still afraid for her life compared to her comrades. I've seen people take the patriotic route in these war stories, but the best stories, in my opinion, portray the soldiers as a little weak but still determined to help the cause. And in this case, that is very much true.

Besides the above mistakes I pointed out, I'd like to see you expand this idea a bit, maybe give the main character a bit of backstory. How did she get herself into this situation? Why is she a part of the Night Witches? How did she meet Alexis? All the answers to these questions can only humanize the main character and make her a more interesting person to read about, which is always a good thing.

Overall, very intriguing concept, it'd be nice to see it expanded a bit.

Signing out,


Gwenavear says...

Thanks for the review!

I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart; I am, I am, I am.
— Sylvia Plath