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kung fu

by Galatea


he moves like a big river
power
and grace
thundering down the mountain side
(when I know more, he says
I'll understand the metaphor)
I can see it in his eyes
reflections of that subtle strenght he possesses
all at once soft, inviting
and a focus to cut glass
gentle intsructor
with arms to move mountains
or cradle in the night
a guarded tenderness hidden
in choice motion
one
two
three
four
everything--he says
is a block and a strike
everything?
arm in arm--block
lips to lips--strike
and a sweet devious grin
so controlled
there is still so much to learn

~~~~

Make it not suck, please!


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Sat Apr 19, 2008 11:25 pm
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like it...




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Fri Apr 18, 2008 1:07 pm
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W1ldF1r3 says...



I don't really understand the meaning very well, how ever I like it this way. It lets me expand on your very nice job and come up with my own meaning.




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Thu Apr 17, 2008 6:29 pm
CK Lynn says...



It's different. Not sure if I like it yet. As Elder Bobo said, what's going on here? Expand on that part of it. I really don't think kung fu is an appropriate title.




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Thu Jan 20, 2005 2:07 pm
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Galatea says...



I'm not going to tell y'all the theme. Part of reading and critiquing poetry is being able to come to a decision about each piece on your own.




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Thu Jan 20, 2005 12:03 pm
Chevy wrote a review...



I agree with Bobo...I'm having a hard time figuring it out myself.

everything--he says
is a block and a strike
everything?
arm in arm--block
lips to lips--strike
and a sweet devious grin
so controlled
there is still so much to learn


This was the most exciting part of the poem...the rest was so-so and I guess it was okay. I just really like the end.




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Thu Jan 20, 2005 6:04 am
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QiGuaiGongFu says...



i love it gal!
the most fabulous wonderous thing i have had the pleasure to read!
:D




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Thu Jan 20, 2005 4:14 am
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Bobo says...



I like it! I'm just a little bit confused about the theme- is the person supposed to be falling in love, or is just naive?




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Thu Jan 20, 2005 1:47 am
Misty says...



It's nice, and I think it flows well. Good job!





“If lightning is the anger of the gods, then the gods are concerned mostly about trees.”
— Lao Tzu