Buzz buzz, my alarm goes off telling me that it's 5:00 in the morning. In the distance I can hear the coffee maker start to brew. I turn on my side and turn off the alarm. I get up to go in the shower, and end up staying in there longer than usual. Unlike my wife Emily, who didn't have to be up till 7, I had to be at work by 6:30. I hurry and get get dresses, then make myself a warm cup of coffee. By now it's 5:30 and I decide to leave to beat the traffic rush that was due to come.
Once I get to my office I wait for Sarah to deliver my work load. I look around the room, trying to kill time, and end up settling on the clock. It was 7, Emily would be calling soon.
"I'm up," she'd say, "I'm at work", I'd say back. The whole conversation was normally over in about a minute of two.
By now I can hear Sarah coming down the hall so I turn back around and wait some more. "Hey Scott." She said smiling and putting my work on my desk. She left before I could say hi back.
My job here at Global Net, was to read and and edit company policies. If they were accepted I would sign it and put it in the Input box. If it had to be changed, I stamped it and put it in the Output box. However the first document wasn't a policy, it was an invitation. John was being promoted and was being sent to our Father company for a higher position, so to celebrate they were having a surprise party. Proudly I marked the date on my calendar and stuck the invite in my desk drawer. The next document however was actually about the company. It read, 'Due to the recent company turnover, all employee benefits and company policies will be renewed by the first of June.' I didn't bother to finish reading it for I knew what was to come next. "Great more work for me." I thought to myself. I signed the paper and placed it in the Input box.
The document after that however was slightly different. It read, 'Due to our few funds, we are getting rid of the janitorial staff and all remaining employee's will be required to tend to the maintenance of the building. No pay increase will be given. This policy will be in effect by June 23, 2012.' Was this a joke? I thought. Without hesitance I signed my name at the bottom and stamped 'REJECTED' in red ink across the paper; then gently placed it in the Out box. And I continued to do this again, and again until my break.
I stand by the water cooler and stare out the window. The sky was dark with gray clouds that covered the city. I stood there drinking the cool water, and eating some dry crackers. Emily would be calling me soon, "I'm on my way to work," she'd say, "I'm on my break," I'd reply. "I love you," she would say, "I love you too," I would say back then hang up. I threw away my paper cup and walked back to my cubical. On the way I over hear Isabel telling Maria about her date.
"He's not only sweet, he's rich too!" She swooned. Rich? In what way I wondered. Was he rich like a fine red wine, or was he rich like a cup of ice cream? I laughed to myself quietly and went back to work.
Before I knew it the day was over and I was on my way home. I walked in the door and was greeted by our dog Molly, who spun around in excitement. I took off my shoes and coat, then headed for the computer. A bright red one flashed on the screen alerting me that I had an email. It read, "Due to your great work performance you are being promoted." Or at least that's what I wished it had said, but in reality it was nothing of the like. In reality it said, "Because of our new management and our low supply of funds, we are sad to announce that you are being let go. Any policy that you have signed will be used in your benefit, and you will recieve a moths worth of pay. Sorry for the inconvenience.
Mark Roberts, Management Team.
I loosen my tie and shuffle to the couch, then stare at the blank t.v screen. Molly decides to join me in my sulking. We sat there for what seemed like 5 minutes, but was actually 2 hours for Emily was coming through the door. "I'm home!" See yelled as she walked around the corner of our city high rise. "How was work?" She asked, puzzled why I was still dressed so properly. "They tried to pass another outrageous policy, but I kindly rejected it." I confessed and took her hand. "Well it sounds like you had a fun day, while I had to participate in a horrid office party!" She smiled then sat in my lap. "I admit it would have been a lot more fun if you were there." She sighed. "Maybe I will," I considered,"or how about you come to mine. We're having a surprise party for John since he's being promoted." She ginned in excitement.
By the time we finished talking it was already 10, and too late to cook, but just right for take out. By eleven we were both fed and off to bed; prepared to start the whole routine over again.
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Crystallia!

Here as requested
First things first, FallenAngel is right about everything. More description would make this ten times more awesome than it already is.
Secondly, you're doing a lot of telling. I really like how you show the conversations between the MC and Sarah on the telephone, but some of the other stuff could be shown as well.
Lastly, you said something about your MC being let go from his job but at the ending you say that the routine will start over again tomorrow... It's just a little confusing. Was he fired, or was it his imagination?
Other than that, it's well-written and interesting, showing the aspect of daily life in a different way.
What would you suggest that I show more of in the story?
At the end he does get fired but he doesn't tell Emily and is still going on with his daily life. When I actually wrote it out there was another part that explained that more but I didn't put it in this version because I'm thinking of extending it. Thanks for the review.
Okay, the story is good, and it's got a good story line, but it needs to be more descriptive. You want your reader to really have a feel for the story. Like here: "By now I can hear Sarah coming down the hall so I turn around and wait some more." I feel like you could have done a lot more with that. If she was wearing high heels you could have said something along the lines of "By now I can hear the pronounced click, click of Sarah's high heels walking down the hall so I turn around waiting to greet her." You see how much more descriptive that was? And also you need to describe your characters somewhere in the story. Like when Scott was getting out of bed, he could have turned around and saw his wife laying there, and you could have a description there. You could have put something like this: "As I groggily dragged myself out of bed and got ready to get my morning shower, I turned around to face my wife and gave her a small kiss on her forehead. I looked down at the dark-haired beauty enviously as she laid there sleeping, not having to get up until 7:00 AM." See how far a little description can go? Now, don't go overboard with it. Don't have so much that your reader is bored, but have enough so that they can visualize it in their head. Other than those few minor things, it was really good:)
Thanks for the review. I see what you mean by it needing to be more descriptive. I'l try and spruce it up some. If you need a review just let me know.