I Can't Help Falling

I love this.
When I first opened this page I was amazed by the structure and placement of the stanzas. They're falling and all over the place, kind of like how the speaker feels right?

And then I notice in the first 3 stanzas, in the first two lines are details of him and the final line is the speaker's desire to connect with him. Then the next 3 stanzas, it is about what she does to get his attention and then his response or lack thereof. I really this because it show organization of thought.

Also I like stanza pressed against the left. It is demanding (but in a good way). The placement, enjambment, and diction express relatable frustration.

Last thing, I like how the stanzas with the word "falling" are in the middle of the page. I feel it gives the sense of falling as it is most suspended in the white.

I don't know. Maybe I am reading way too much into it, but I wanted to express my praise of your intention throughout the poem.

I also, noticed that as they each come down, they get shorter, and the gives great build up.

I read your other works and admire them so much, and this was not a disappointment.

Thanks for sharing this poem about someone who is infatuated with another person who doesn't seem to notice. It is hard to accept that we don't attracted a person whom we find extremely attractive.


The poem reminded me of the many occasions that it happened to me. It was a very frustrating and bitter experience and one very hard to accept. Especially frustrating is that no matter the effort, it seemed as if I had been invisible just as the poem describes. Wasted precious years chasing a will-o'-the-wisp, which wanted to be chased for her own personal amusement. So the speaker in this poem is fortunate that the admired individual is not someone who enjoys playing around. The person described is sending a clear message that there is absolutely no interest there. That is honestly and honesty is the decent way to respond.

As to the poem itself, at first I was taken aback by the way it is displayed. But on the second read it was OK. The tone of deep desire is conveyed clearly and effectively. As a reader i felt sorry for the speaker. Ending by saying that she can't date for seven months just left me wondering why. What would be preventing it? Who or what is restricting her?

suggestion

A little more detail about his appearance would have been nice. That would help the reader understand why she is so fascinated and why she considers him perfect. Sure, we have brown eyes and a calloused smooth hand. But cannot see what she is finding so irresistible.

Looking forward to reading more of your work.

The cover's so nice, and so is the poem