Prologue

Growing up I was never the popular kid. I live in Caracas in the country of Venezuela. I used to go to an International School called "Colegio International de Venezuela". It was a private school in all English. My parents talked Spanish and my sister was enrolled in the school too. I remember growing up with the same kids, which were around 15 kids per grade. I remember my life since kindergarten. I met my "best friend", Justin Kay. He was always the tall kid. He had black hair and black eyes and I can still remember he wasn't very popular either therefore he always played with smaller kids.I remember he and another of our kindergarten friends used to play house and they never wanted to be my husband. Maybe I l wasn't pretty enough... or they were just boys. I remember I almost kissed him when we were playing the getting married scene.

Then we have first grade where I met my second best friend, Nathan Brenson. I remember the first time I saw him. I fell in love with his blue eyes. I remember going home to my mother and telling him he was my blue prince. I remember I also told a "girl friend" of mine that I had a crush on him and she told him. I remember crying that whole night when Nathan asked me if it was true if I really had such a crush on him. I became friends with him after lying about saying that... or at least I guess. He was very kind and perfect. Perfect handwriting perfect blond hair perfect family. I used to venerate him. He was always the type of kid who would lead. He was the leader of my group, the kid that would be the captain while we were his crew or the leader of the posse in a gang fight.

By second grade a new kid called Matthias Jacker came along with some other kids. They became our enemies. The "bad guys". I remember we started to play the "good group" and they were the squad we wanted to defeat. I remember once in 3rd grade my friend Justin, who was quite clumsy like myself sprained his finger and the teacher Ms. Erika asked who would volunteer to take him to the nurse. Matthias it was. We all turned to look at Nathan for his expression but he just remained calmly talking to his new friend Lucas Hiatt which was son of a famous Venezuelan Actriz. He was quite a dumb kid in my opinion. Probably a attention seeker. He was always acting stupid and "sponge bobish" (if you know what I mean". I guess Nathan just liked to have someone to boss around.

Anyways, after around 20 minutes Matthias came back to grab Justin's stuff with a smirk on his face. I guess his finger broke itself he said to Nathan. We then learned that Justin had insulted Matthias with god knows what and he simply decided to finish breaking Justin's finger before arriving to the nurse. We never told a teacher fearing whatever Justin said would get him Into the principals office.

By fourth grade I remember my love for Nathan had grown bigger. I remember one time I was brave enough pass him a note during science class saying:

Do you want to be my boyfriend:

Circle:

Yes

No

Maybe

He circled maybe and I remember my heart skipped a beat. I remember we then became "something" but since it was fourth grade it didn't really mean anything. Eventually we just stopped the nonsense. I remember I would try to do all sorts of things to catch his attention I even started telling him I was a witch and that's how a new game of ours began. We would go around acting as if I had powers he was the leader and Justin was the muscle I guess. We would always sit together at lunch planning on how to defeat them. It was all going smoothly until I decided he didn't care about me. I remember I would hide in the library or behind a building then appearing after lunch was over jus to see if he noticed I was gone. I remember the only one who would ask was Justin. I remember I would try so hard to be perfect but failing.

Once Matthias who was the leader of the other "gang" would laugh at my failing attempt of catching Nathan's attention. Once he gathered his gang to force me into this tube in the park where I was grabbed and forced into the middle of it where I found reluctant Nathan there too. I recall them forcing us to kiss and "get it over with". That it was obvious we liked each other. But I still believe it was one sided. I slowly started to try to break apart from my mad love toward this kid and surprisingly fell for Matthias who was just the opposite. Matthias and Nathan both were quite short and skinny. Matthias had brown hair and eyes with a skinny long face while Nathan had a skinny freckled face and blonde hair with beautiful blue eyes. I started hanging out with Matthias who was he same as Nathan in character but kinder and maybe more interested in my well being. It was then when Justin came to me and asked me to hang out with them again told me he missed me. I then started hanging out with him, Lucas, and Nathan. Nathan didn't seem to care. I remember I was and am a very expressive person and my feelings were clear as spring water while he was more reserved. He then was obsessed with this Gumball show which we would act out as characters from the series. He normally was the main character, Gumball and I wanted to be, Penny the girl or peanut Gumball the cat liked. He didn't allow me to be Penny though and I was stuck with a ghost who he claimed was as cool as Penny. He told me he wanted this pretty girl in 5th grade to be Penny. This girl was called Paula she was beautiful, raven hair with black eyes and chubby cheeks very conservative style. Sweet girl but I couldn't help disliking her. I wanted to be like her but my mom couldn't help. She didn't let me wear skirts or shorts to school saying it was to revealing for school. All my friends wore them and I was the only one that didn't wear them. I was stuck wearing pants and a ponytail for my long brunette hair. My mom forced me to keep my hair up but I felt so ugly and I tried to take it off at school hoping to look a bit prettier like the other girls. I remember my confidence level was always low I guess it was partially Nathan's comments that made me feel that way. I then remember my mother made me change schools to snigger school In the same city.

This school was called ECA. Escuela Campo Alegre was a big school compared to my previous school there I was greeted with open arms and was somewhat popular. I tried so hard to be something I wasn't. Yet looking back it's so funny how bad I wanted to wear Justice clothes with all that sparkle to be able to fit in my 5th grade class. I there crushed on a cute guy called Daniel which dated the most popular girl in 5th grade, Leticia. I was one of her minions you could say. I fitted in until 6th grade when I had to move to miami and spent like 1/3 of school year there until I came back to Venezuela and into ECA, everybody were so surprised to see me and had already formed their groups therefore I was forced to sit with a group of girls who were best friends with each other and knew each other Since 1st grade. I then met my first boyfriend an Italian kid called Nicklas Frickersan. He was such a gentleman and made me feel like a princess. I then learned he had asked out a couple popular girls and had been rejected. He asked me out at a school pool party. We were playing truth or dare with a group of friends and he asked me to tell him who I liked. I told him I would tell him if he told me who he liked too. We then moved away from the group so we could exchange information. He then tried to get the name from me but I felt like he didn't like me so so was scared to tell him. He then told me we could guess who each other liked by the other persons description of the person. I then started describing him as a handsome, brown haired and brown eyes tall kid who had Spanish with me (this was the only class I had with him) I said he was a gentleman that he was so funny and quirky. He described his girl as a pretty , witty, smart, brunette and brown eyed that had the cutest smile and made his day. He then said this,

"I believe you like me and I like you. Is that right?" I very shyly agreed and he then asked me out I then agreed and it was really awkward. We then both went to go eat while we mad fun of each other and laughed at everything like the class clowns we were. He then left to go change and I said goodbye too. My relationship with him lasted a whole school year. We were such a cute couple yet he wanted more. I had always been a very modest girl since my mother was very strict and overprotective therefore the closest we every got to a kiss were kisses on the cheek and hugs. I then started to get jealous because of some rumors about him liking other girls. I tried to make him jealous but nothing seemed to work. I remember he once told me he thought Venezuelan girls were very emotional about break ups and that I would probably cry a lot when we broke up. I wanted to break up with him right there in the spot but I guess I had gotten used to the way we were just the two of us. He had started to become not only my boyfriend but my best friend. I didn't want to hurt him yet at the end of the year my mother took my phone and told me I should enjoy summer or some shit and I stopped having contact with him.

During summer I went to this day camp were I spent time with my old camp friends. We had a blast at summer until one of my camp best friends Jack started to have a crush on me after we had heart to heart conversations in which we talked about each other's childhoods. He then brought out parts of me that I didn't know I had. He made me softer than I ever thought I was. He asked me out but I said no believing Nicklas and I would go back to how we were after summer. I was really stupid since after summer Nicklas changed from the gentleman he was to a completar asshole. He asked me if I had gotten his break up text and made me seem like a fool. I tried to explain that I didn't have my phone during summer but he told me he had planned to break up with me since last year this was 7th grade and he told me I was too much of an angel for him. That I was to pure and that I didn't even kiss him but believe me when I tell you he told me not to kiss him because it would draw too much attention to us! Like what an asshole. I had been blinded by whatever was between us to see what a shitty guy he actually was. I then started to focus on making friends. I then met my best friend for the year Darla and Clarissa and another 2 friends. We were really good friends until Angela and Akila my two other friends started to make other friends and slowly grew apart from us. So then it was only Darla, Clarissa and I. Akila and Darla started a feud and we all turned our backs on her since she started making rumores about Akila and that was simple not cool. Let's just say that by 8th grade Darla wasn't my friend anymore and I felt like Clarissa and I were more separated than usual. I remember in 7th grade Nicklas and I were constantly fighting and made a fight out of anything we could think of. I remember we started fighting over the meaning of a word and how it could be interpreted in different ways.

In 8th grade I met my current best friend Sarah and a couple of other friends. I kept on fighting with my ex but what else was new? We had made somewhat "peace" on a NY and Washington DC trip we had as a school field trip. We declared to be friends and let our history behind. But, even if we tried we still righted like husband and wife. I remember at our moving in ceremony he came up to me and asked me to fix his tie and I could help but imagine what would our lives be like if I had still be dating him. It was such a small thing that marked me so much. I felt like his wife sending her husband of to work. It was then when I realized it was all over next year I would be a high schooler and things would change but my past would affect me in many ways to create the person I will become. I was moving to Miami, Florida for 9th grade and I was so aprehensivo yet sad to leave my best friend behind. I Skype with her every Friday told her how things were going and she would keep me updated about issues over there like the fact that Nicklas was still being an asshole.