Published September 14, 2016
Chapter 1
Ethan:"Hey can I go to the movies with Samantha and Cody?"
Mom:"No, what if ISIS kidnaps you!"
Isa:"Can I go to the Starbucks around the corner with Ethan?"
Mom:"No, what if he makes you do something you don't want to do!"
Me:"He is my age and we are not dating and you know his mother."
Mom:"Well, what if a car kills you?"
Me:"Hey can I go to Forever 21 with Isa while you go to the gap?"
Mom:"What if you get lost?"
Me: "There's a map and Isa."
Mom:"What if there's a terrorist attack?"
Mom:"Just come along with me,"
15 minutes later...
Mom: "why are you so close to me. Walk in front."
Me: "Are you kidding me?!"
Etc.
Chapter 1
11:38
My point here is... It's summer and a 15 year old turning 16 like me can't do shit. Why? Simple answer overprotective parents. In my case I have a divorced mother who is going to go crazy bout' anything she sees in the news. I just wonder what would happen if I just... Run away for summer. :)
Me: (vivid/adventurous tone) Isa, wanna have fun this summer?
Isa: not sure that's allowed, Sam (laughs)
Me: let me guess... your parents!
Isa:(sarcastically) way to go! You got it!
Me: what if ...we just maybe...
Isa: what are you thinking? Get straight to the point.
Me: (blurted out) Let's run away Isa with our friends. We can stay at my cousin's
Isa: We would get killed, literally
Me: come on! It will be worth it. We will be calling once a week or so.
Isa: dude, I don't think so
Me: are you in or not
Isa: who else is going?
Me: I'll call Ethan and Cody
Isa: if at least one of them agrees I'm in.
Me: promise?
Isa: yeah, promise
(Dial Ethan's number)
Me: E! It's Sam
Ethan: yeah, what's up doll
Me: wanna have a blast this summer?
Ethan: I do but it depends on what you have in mind. And it's not my decision either way.
Me: it is
Ethan: contact my parents to see if I'm allowed.
Me: bro, this doesn't regard your parents
Ethan: Aja I'm hearing you
Me: let's do something daring lik...
Ethan: not allowed
Me: like running away
Ethan: red roses are to overated I want tulips in my funeral if you don't mind...
Me: come on!!!! We'll stay in my cousin's. All summer... And call every week or so
Ethan: what bout' when we get back
Me: it will be worth it
Ethan: I'm in, how much time should I back for.
Me: 2 months.
Ethan: deal, call you in 30 min.
Me: hell yeah! By the way E..Bring your stash of money
(Calling Cody)
Cody: (sleepy voice) Hi... Sam?
Sam: codyyyyyyy
Cody: (still sleepy voice) saaaaammm
Sam: wanna do something
Cody: at this time?
Sam: no, tomorrow morning
Cody: I'm not allowed too early. Come on Sam, you know this.
Sam: I know but, the thing is... You don't need permission for this
Cody: dude, I need permission to even tie my shoe laces
Sam: this is not tying your shoe laces Cody. Let's run away.
Cody: (sexy low voice) I'm sorry Sammy but I don't feel that way bout' you... It must be har...
Sam: (annoyed) stop it!
Cody: chill Samantha, you know I love you... As a friend of course
Sam: Ethan and Isa are in. You in?
Cody: Isa? She doesn't quite fit the type that runs away.
Sam: she said if one of you agreed she was in... Ethan agreed.
Cody: when do we leave?
Sam: tomorrow morning to my cousin's. Call you at 5:15
Cody: how much clothes
Sam: 2 months
Cody: parents
Sam: we'll deal with that later. Cod, bring money.
Cody: ok, bye
Sam: talk to you tomorrow, sleeping beauty.
(Receiving call from Ethan)
Me: yeah
Ethan: when are we leaving?
Me: tomorrow morning. Cody is in. Call you at 5.
Ethan: *yawns* bye, see ya tomorrow
Me: I'll leave you to ya beauty sleep
(Call Isa)
Isa: hey, how did it go, Sammy?
Me: both in
Isa: Darn it! ok, how long?
Me: 2 months
Isa: shit, ok
Me: *yawns* need to pack! Call you tomorrow at 5. Bring ya money!
Isa: may the force be with you
Me: yeah, yeah
*packing in silence*
*hides suitcase and backpack under the bed*
The next morning^^^^^^^Chapter 2
I wake up at 4:30 by the buzzing and soft ring of my phone in my ear. I get out of bed soundlessly. Get my bags and phone and keys etc. once I close the door I realize I did it. I am free. I call an uber. Once in I ask the driver:
Me: hey take me to 1050 Brickell avenue
Uber girl: sure it's 5 bucks
Me: no prob
Uber girl: what is such a young girl doing out of her house at this time? And via Brickell?
Me: going to stay at my cousin's with a couple of friends.
Uber girl: does she know?
Me: she will
We then arrived at Ethan's place.
Uber girl: we're here
Me: (calling Ethan) hey I'm here
Ethan: I'm going to down with the bags. A couple of minutes later I see Ethan coming out of the building with a luggage and a backpack.
Ethan: Sam!
He says entering the car.
Me: Ethan! You have Everything?
Ethan: yup ( kisses my cheek)
Me:why was that for? I say noticing my cheeks flushing.
Ethan: (murmured in my ear) I'm just letting you know
We then both went quite. We have had feeling for each other since 6th grade but, never had a real relationship because of our parents.
Me: now to Keviscane. I don't know the exact address but I'll get you there.
Uber girl: okay. By the way you guys make such a cute couple.
I was about to say we weren't a couple when Ethan interrupted.
Ethan: thanks
I looked at Ethan and raised an eyebrow. He then held my hand. I smiled at him then asked in a whisper,
Me: so is it official?
Ethan: do you want it to be?
Me: yeah
We then arrived at Cody's house.
(I dialed his number)
Me: Cody we are here
Cody: let me gather my things.
Me: k
We then see Cody coming out of the house with a giant luggage and a little bag on top.
me: thank god this is a xl
Uber girl: (laughs) On the back!
Cody: lower the voice!
He then gets in the car and sees Ethan and I holding hands.
Cody: Finally!
Uber girl: do your parents know you are doing this
Me: no
Uber girl: do they care?
Me: more than they should
Uber girl: ooooohhh, I had those too..never had the guts to do what you are doing though.
Me: next stop is in coconut grove. I'll get you there. While I told the girl where the house was Cody said this to Ethan,
Cody: how did you tell her
Ethan: let's face it, we all knew it was mutual. I came in the car kissed her cheek and told her I just wanted to let her know. Then she made it official.
Cody: with a full kiss?
Ethan: no she just asked.
Cody: dude, you didn't even get a full kiss!
Ethan: I don't need that. I just want to be able to call her mine for now.
Cody: what a gentlemen! (Taps Sam's arm) Good choice!
I turn around confused.
Me: what?
Cody: no, you just got a great guy that's all. Let's go get Isa.
Once at Isa's,
Me: (calles Isa) hey we are here.
Isa: are you sure you want to do this
Me:yeah
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
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Hi!

I read the story. and at first I was kind of blown away that they would just be fed up and run away for two months! I find that to be extremely irresponsible for kids who are so young but then I read again and I realized this was a big what if scenario. All in the imagination. It would have been really interesting if you didn't mention it until the end. That way you could play with the emotions of the reader and at the end just make mention that she was just wondering the whole time. Unless you were hoping we would skim pass that. if that's the case. my bad.
Great play or novel. I look forward to reading more.
Not sure if this is what you're going for, but it feels more like a play than a novel, not that there is anything wrong with that. A lot of it seems really really conversational, and to be fair it is a conversation, but I think it would be nice to have some breaks from talking and maybe describe what a character is thinking or the setting, or something else along those lines.
As for the story, those are some very brazen kids haha. I would never have the guts to do what they do. I am interested to see what happens to them, and if this trip turns out to be worth it or not.
I really like this chapter. It's very enticing. I hope you continue it. Thanks