Dearly Treasured Brother

This is a very good poem and I like how you made this rime it kind of made it more light heart-ed. Even though this is about morning your brothers death it also celebrates it making it more readable which is great. Also I love the wording and detail put into it just makes it that more sentimental it's great. Truly something good to read. It's great you wrote o something you knew about. It makes the work relate-able. It's really good and I definitely think poetry is one of your strong points.

First off I want to say I enjoyed the poem overall. I also understand why you wrote it. As someone who has experienced loss first hand like you I know there is an urge to let them be know, let the world see them and who they were and everything they could've been. I like the vocabulary used and overall tone of the poem, it is fitting of it. One thing I cannot get behind is the rhyme. I know rhyming is fun and I too immensely enjoy making words rhyme in poems but often it can subtract from how powerful the poem is. If you try to rhyme you tend to throw away more useful vocabulary in exchange for worse vocabulary that happens to rhyme, and often times lines will be restructured or sometimes even whole stanzas for the sake of a single rhyme. This is all well and good for poetry that is for fun. But if you want your poetry to carry a clear and powerful message, that is memorable and engaging you sort of need to drop the structured rhyme. While I must say you rhyme rather well in this poem it is just a good practice to keep out of rhyme or in the very least make sure it secondary to everything else. I'm not going to do nitpicks because everyone does them, they're essentially useless to anyone who is willing to proof read and most people do them to add words and length to their reviews anyway. I hope you cope with the loss and make better from it. Message me if you want to talk about anything or actually want my nitpicks.