Published October 11, 2011
I laugh at your jokes,
I jest with your words,
I smile at your looks,
I continue living each and every day.
I hurt inside. Laugh.
I don’t want to tell you. Jest.
I feel insecure. Smile.
I’m upset. Continue.
I cry. Laugh.
I long to tell you. Jest.
I scream inside. Smile.
I’m sad. Continue.
Laugh. Jest. Smile. Continue
I don’t know what to do.
Laugh. Jest. Smile. Continue.
I don’t know what to say.
Laugh. Jest. Smile. Continue.
You are my ocean of emptiness.
Points:
Time spent:
IP address:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
I wrote this about a guy who I actually still like when I realized he liked someone else. I even saw them kissing. I continue to be his friend even though it hurts me inside to be there with him and joke around and talk. The pattern came to me when I was riding home on my bike crying after I saw them kissing.
This poem was good. But if you ask me, it made no sense, probably because you didnt have a story line or plot. What are you talking about? Is this "jest" because of a person. Who? What? Where? Why? Who made you feel this way, is it even because of a person? Who is the person your laughing at? Where is this taking place? School home? Why? Why? Why? Why?
lovely! this IS a sad poem
I love how you took the words from the first stanza and continued them throughout the poem! one nit-picky thing I have to say is that when you say this,
I would change the "sad" to a better word. "I'm aching, I'm falling...etc" I feel these words would better evoke the tone with which the rest of the poem follows.good job!